WEBVTT 00:00:09.840 --> 00:00:15.060 So we're gonna start off with a little bio on doctor Fernando Alessandri. 00:00:16.065 --> 00:00:27.845 He earned his MS in clinical psychology from Divine Mercy University in 2011 and went on to earn a PhD at the University of Mississippi in 2016. 00:00:28.460 --> 00:00:37.680 His training included a practicum, internship, and postdoc at Veterans Administration Medical Centers in Honolulu and San Diego. 00:00:39.100 --> 00:00:40.640 Welcome, doctor Alessandri. 00:00:40.860 --> 00:00:41.260 Thank you. 00:00:41.260 --> 00:00:43.200 Thank you so much for being here. 00:00:44.555 --> 00:00:44.795 Great. 00:00:44.795 --> 00:00:45.855 Thank you, Natalia. 00:00:45.995 --> 00:00:46.815 This is awesome. 00:00:46.875 --> 00:00:50.895 And thank you everyone that's joining in, taking out some time for this. 00:00:53.115 --> 00:00:58.495 As a therapist, I was thinking maybe we start with a little mindfulness because I know people are coming. 00:00:58.715 --> 00:00:59.680 Life is tight. 00:00:59.680 --> 00:01:01.940 Everybody's running in all sorts of directions. 00:01:04.640 --> 00:01:08.080 I think I already checked with Natalia that you can hear me okay. 00:01:08.080 --> 00:01:12.820 I hope if anyone can't hear me, they'll put something in the chat, and we'll address it. 00:01:14.385 --> 00:01:15.605 But let's do a little mindfulness. 00:01:15.745 --> 00:01:26.165 So if you're comfortable, I invite you to close your eyes, take a deep breath, and I just want you to picture what you've already been through today. 00:01:27.720 --> 00:01:43.265 Meaning, if you can remember waking up, what was your first the first thing you saw, the first sounds you heard, what it was like, where you ended up next. 00:01:44.365 --> 00:01:48.205 Maybe you took a shower, got dressed. 00:01:48.205 --> 00:01:50.785 Maybe you ended up in a vehicle of some kind. 00:01:51.885 --> 00:02:12.015 If you're in some kind of transportation, just picture the number of sites that drifted by as you considered your day, where you were going, where you were coming from, just the overall assault on the mind that we all experience every day from so many things going on. 00:02:15.615 --> 00:02:33.890 And just wanna create a chance to breathe and to acknowledge and to prepare to finally slow down and really be present, Just recognizing it's already been a swirl, and the day is not over yet. 00:02:33.890 --> 00:02:35.110 You have more to come. 00:02:36.370 --> 00:02:42.605 And just kinda giving a little breathing space to that because it's already been a lot. 00:02:44.665 --> 00:02:53.145 And by centering, by acknowledging it, taking that breath, maybe wiggling the jaw, a lot of us tense up our jaws a lot or like that. 00:02:53.145 --> 00:03:08.060 And so you gotta counter it, wiggling it, rubbing your eyes, kind of finding those little reliefs, taking the deep breath, and just kinda centering yourself so you can be more fully present here. 00:03:08.060 --> 00:03:14.385 Because if there's something still weighing on you, if your car is illegally parked, you're not gonna be fully present. 00:03:14.765 --> 00:03:22.945 We often need to take care of what's pulling at us, give it a little bit of attention, and then it usually calms down a little. 00:03:24.300 --> 00:03:24.620 Alright. 00:03:24.620 --> 00:03:25.840 So let's dive in. 00:03:26.220 --> 00:03:28.400 Thank you for participating in that. 00:03:30.460 --> 00:03:30.860 Alright. 00:03:30.860 --> 00:03:38.995 So I put on here this old mechanical machine that was very important for World War two to help the military decipher messages. 00:03:39.695 --> 00:03:48.115 And that seems to be, you know, another age we're living in where we have so much communication going on, and and we don't know what's what. 00:03:48.175 --> 00:03:50.850 And people are constantly offering to help us. 00:03:50.930 --> 00:03:55.670 And, like, if you go on anywhere, everything is just sucking for our attention all the time. 00:03:55.810 --> 00:03:56.610 It's look at me. 00:03:56.610 --> 00:03:57.570 Look what I did. 00:03:57.570 --> 00:03:57.890 Hey. 00:03:57.890 --> 00:03:58.930 Somebody come over here. 00:03:58.930 --> 00:04:01.030 I'm do I find myself doing it. 00:04:01.650 --> 00:04:05.670 Obviously, we had to drum up, you know, attention on this. 00:04:07.175 --> 00:04:12.455 And, again, to validate that, wow, we are being bombarded all the time, and we need to step back. 00:04:12.455 --> 00:04:15.175 But, also, we need to do a lot of filtering and saying, okay. 00:04:15.175 --> 00:04:19.735 What is for my good, and what's a distraction, and things like that. 00:04:19.735 --> 00:04:20.955 So let's proceed. 00:04:22.500 --> 00:04:23.720 Let me do some disclosures. 00:04:24.980 --> 00:04:26.980 So I'm presenting my own ideas. 00:04:26.980 --> 00:04:29.640 None of this was vetted through Divine Mercy University. 00:04:30.500 --> 00:04:35.175 They, you know, I like the saying, take what you like and leave the rest. 00:04:35.175 --> 00:04:36.615 You may not agree with everything. 00:04:36.615 --> 00:04:37.915 It may not all be useful. 00:04:38.295 --> 00:04:41.915 My goals are to not bore you and to make this worth your time. 00:04:43.015 --> 00:04:46.475 I have a lot of creative pursuits, so I'll probably be mentioning throughout. 00:04:47.175 --> 00:04:49.575 My humor just comes and goes all over the place. 00:04:49.575 --> 00:04:54.340 So I might meant I'm not here to sell T shirts, but, yes, I make T shirts and mugs. 00:04:54.340 --> 00:04:57.160 And I just wrote a book, and I have all these things going on. 00:04:57.540 --> 00:05:08.935 So just, I have a private practice, and I'm expanding into coaching to be less limited to psychology and more psychology and more drawing in from my other backgrounds and also to cross state lines and country lines. 00:05:09.715 --> 00:05:24.190 I come from a cog cognitive behavioral background and with an emphasis on attachment and spirituality that we're connected and that there are bigger things going on, but and that ideas matter. 00:05:24.330 --> 00:05:26.990 The stuff floating in our head is part of our environment. 00:05:27.530 --> 00:05:41.645 So even though, like, I initially start with behaviorism, just like where are we on the same level as animals as we navigate our environment, Then we have to add thoughts to that and then the navigation of relationships and social and spirituality. 00:05:42.505 --> 00:05:44.925 So those are kind of my perspective. 00:05:45.625 --> 00:05:53.910 I use my same brain, my same mind when I'm doing science or if I'm on jury duty being asked whether to convict someone or not. 00:05:54.370 --> 00:05:57.810 And in my religious thinking, it's all the same to me. 00:05:57.810 --> 00:06:01.890 I don't like, oh, let's put that kind aside and now do something else. 00:06:01.890 --> 00:06:04.790 For me, they're all it's a unified experience. 00:06:07.125 --> 00:06:09.705 Divine Mercy University is a Catholic university. 00:06:10.085 --> 00:06:24.140 So I just wanna kinda mention this, the squeaky versus squeaky clean in the tradition of saints, you have your Saint Therese of Lisieux, very pious, very holy, only lived to 23, probably didn't do a lot wrong. 00:06:24.680 --> 00:06:28.700 But a lot of us come from a more squeaky, not so squeaky clean tradition. 00:06:28.760 --> 00:06:35.180 There's some squeaks, and, we've done wrong, and we've hurt people and all sorts of things, and all are welcome here. 00:06:37.295 --> 00:06:37.535 Okay. 00:06:37.535 --> 00:06:38.975 So, yeah, I went to DMU. 00:06:38.975 --> 00:06:41.395 It was they helped me transition to psychology. 00:06:41.455 --> 00:06:47.875 I had had twenty two years of experience mentoring kids and then adults and college students. 00:06:48.335 --> 00:06:53.030 And and those were always on the side, but it had provoked interest in mental health. 00:06:53.030 --> 00:06:54.390 Like, what else is going on here? 00:06:54.390 --> 00:07:01.690 I knew a lot about the spiritual sides, especially the Catholic tradition, Christian traditions, but gained a curiosity. 00:07:01.830 --> 00:07:07.065 And so finally, with the economy of 2008, was trying to make it in Hollywood, and I had been in advertising. 00:07:08.165 --> 00:07:12.585 And I decided to pursue psychology, and and DMU at the time was called IPS. 00:07:13.525 --> 00:07:18.345 They were very welcoming and helped me make that transition even though I had, like, no background in it. 00:07:18.560 --> 00:07:22.400 But a lot of I was like a kid in a candy story, very eager to learn. 00:07:22.400 --> 00:07:27.140 So that was 02/2009 to 2011, then I went on to a PhD in Mississippi. 00:07:28.560 --> 00:07:30.320 And then okay. 00:07:30.320 --> 00:07:33.445 I made a mistake of praying to God that he make me a good therapist. 00:07:33.505 --> 00:07:44.085 I didn't wanna be the kind that was clueless that, you know, sometimes you see them on TV or maybe you've met them in person where they have pictures that just show wealth and unrelatability. 00:07:45.265 --> 00:07:49.210 And, I did make the mistake of praying that God would make me a good therapist. 00:07:49.350 --> 00:07:54.010 And because of that, I think he sent my life in extremely roller coaster y directions. 00:07:55.430 --> 00:08:00.970 And the upside of that has been that I've had to move around the country a bunch to follow my son. 00:08:01.055 --> 00:08:06.275 The upside of that has been the amount of experience they've been able to accumulate in the last fifteen years. 00:08:08.095 --> 00:08:10.515 So it took me to three VA medical centers. 00:08:10.735 --> 00:08:18.000 I had a post a great postdoc in what's called SMI, serious mental illness, focused on psychosis, bipolar trauma. 00:08:18.140 --> 00:08:21.020 My own dissertation work was on trauma. 00:08:21.020 --> 00:08:30.485 And I was always interested in brief therapies for trauma because I was horrified at a crisis center where we would have people between three days and twenty one days. 00:08:30.485 --> 00:08:36.265 And the staff was afraid to touch trauma, and the nurses just wanted to inject everybody and keep them all calm. 00:08:36.405 --> 00:08:37.685 And it was like, my goodness. 00:08:37.685 --> 00:08:38.745 You have these people. 00:08:38.885 --> 00:08:45.120 A lot of them were frequent flyers, meaning they came back a lot, either because of suicidality or addiction. 00:08:45.900 --> 00:08:53.360 And trauma were the big three I saw a lot, and then couples and, like, relationship conflict, literally, that was getting violent and stuff. 00:08:53.580 --> 00:08:54.955 And they didn't wanna touch trauma. 00:08:54.955 --> 00:08:56.175 And I was like, this is ridiculous. 00:08:56.475 --> 00:09:01.375 You can't say that your only cure for trauma requires that you have someone for, like, a year of attention. 00:09:01.915 --> 00:09:10.820 We have to have short ways to get at this stuff and give people the tools to handle it even if what we start, we were not able to finish. 00:09:11.360 --> 00:09:15.360 There was this whole mentality that it's like a Pandora's box and you just don't touch it. 00:09:15.360 --> 00:09:16.080 It was absurd. 00:09:16.080 --> 00:09:18.260 Anyway, so that has guided me a lot. 00:09:19.120 --> 00:09:24.135 And then, yeah, in addition to working with veterans, I've worked with community mental health. 00:09:24.135 --> 00:09:24.375 Okay. 00:09:24.375 --> 00:09:26.295 I think Natalia already mentioned this stuff. 00:09:26.295 --> 00:09:34.170 But more recently, prisons and a forensic hospital and trying to understand who's getting locked up and issues around that. 00:09:34.490 --> 00:09:34.890 Okay. 00:09:34.890 --> 00:09:36.010 Let's move on. 00:09:36.010 --> 00:09:38.970 So with AI, I found this cartoon. 00:09:38.970 --> 00:09:40.190 I thought it was very appropriate. 00:09:40.650 --> 00:09:43.770 It's you know, some of it is amazing. 00:09:43.770 --> 00:09:50.535 I think we probably all are using it already to summarize a lot of information, but we're kinda wondering, well, what's inside? 00:09:50.535 --> 00:09:51.495 What are the risks? 00:09:51.495 --> 00:09:53.335 What's this gonna do to us? 00:09:53.335 --> 00:09:54.715 What's it gonna do to therapy? 00:09:56.135 --> 00:09:57.995 So we're not we're sorta hesitant. 00:09:58.055 --> 00:09:59.255 Do we let this thing in? 00:09:59.255 --> 00:10:00.695 To what extent do we let it in? 00:10:00.695 --> 00:10:01.675 What's going on? 00:10:02.935 --> 00:10:09.250 As therapists and in other professions, I think we're working on people's unsolved miseries. 00:10:09.550 --> 00:10:21.985 There's so much depression, suicidality, loss of hope, hopelessness, reliance on pills, and all sorts of addictions and things where we're seeking answers. 00:10:23.325 --> 00:10:34.250 There's a lot of hope that maybe we can just get some sort of vision or a hologram or, you know, some sort of wise people from somewhere that are gonna give us the answers. 00:10:35.670 --> 00:10:38.810 Growing up, Hitchhiker's Guide was very popular. 00:10:39.110 --> 00:10:40.410 I grew up in New York. 00:10:40.550 --> 00:10:41.510 People were reading this. 00:10:41.510 --> 00:10:51.885 I have yet to read it, actually, but I just remember the answer to the the questions of the mysteries of life, the universe, and everything was 42. 00:10:52.825 --> 00:11:02.285 And there is still sort of that mentality on some sides where if we could just give people the answers, everything's gonna be okay. 00:11:03.770 --> 00:11:08.250 And within Christianity, you know, we could say, well, we think we have the answer. 00:11:08.250 --> 00:11:12.110 We have this relationship with the creator and all this stuff. 00:11:12.330 --> 00:11:35.210 But even moving beyond that, there are some things where we are just gonna need a mechanic, where we have to respect this area, this domain of just what are the human science, what is beyond the relationship with God, where even if you're a believer and you think God's gonna lead you through that thing, it's still, okay. 00:11:35.210 --> 00:11:36.890 But what are the efforts I need to make? 00:11:36.890 --> 00:11:38.010 What do I need to put in? 00:11:38.010 --> 00:11:45.950 And what are the human resources I need to to get to look at my car, to get to look under the hood here? 00:11:47.505 --> 00:11:51.905 Even if you journal, like, journaling is great, and I'm gonna talk more about it at length later. 00:11:51.905 --> 00:11:56.545 But maybe the inspiration is still gonna be something very practical. 00:11:56.545 --> 00:11:58.165 Did you check the timing belt? 00:11:59.280 --> 00:11:59.520 Okay. 00:11:59.520 --> 00:12:02.240 So we got a lot of people asking, what's wrong with me? 00:12:02.240 --> 00:12:06.260 And they wanna know about anxiety and depression and bipolar and schizophrenia. 00:12:06.400 --> 00:12:10.980 People are self diagnosing, and they wanna know about addiction and impulsiveness. 00:12:11.520 --> 00:12:17.435 And they're your readers, people that are reading the self help books, And I'm pro all that. 00:12:18.055 --> 00:12:24.475 I prefer I'm not it was funny because in, at my second grad school, I was involved in interviewing. 00:12:25.575 --> 00:12:30.740 And the people I always thought would be great candidates to become psychologists always got rejected. 00:12:30.800 --> 00:12:33.700 And I think it was because they were I had been an older student. 00:12:34.240 --> 00:12:36.900 And I don't know if some of the faculty was intimidated. 00:12:37.440 --> 00:12:39.040 They wanted people they could form. 00:12:39.040 --> 00:12:42.900 They didn't want people that already came with a lot of ideas and a lot of life experience. 00:12:44.855 --> 00:12:48.475 And there's a danger to producing always 22 year old therapists. 00:12:48.615 --> 00:12:49.595 Like, okay. 00:12:49.815 --> 00:12:50.215 Yeah. 00:12:50.215 --> 00:12:58.535 But, but, anyway, so I'm all for a lot of self help and finding what resources you can first. 00:12:58.535 --> 00:13:04.370 And, therefore, yeah, some AI to try to summarize the things. 00:13:05.070 --> 00:13:09.310 So part of what I'm doing here is trying to organize where does it fit, because it's great. 00:13:09.310 --> 00:13:18.495 If we can take all this knowledge that's out there, all the books that have been written, all this stuff, and have it in your cell phone, I mean, that's a great resource. 00:13:18.555 --> 00:13:22.975 I'm not gonna deny that, and I don't think we need to be afraid of that per se. 00:13:23.115 --> 00:13:25.135 So it's just a great tool, a great resource. 00:13:28.500 --> 00:13:35.320 But at the end, when it comes time to talk to someone and Jean Paul too used to talk about information overload. 00:13:35.380 --> 00:13:36.580 Like, how crazy is it? 00:13:36.580 --> 00:13:38.900 There's just too much information at some point. 00:13:38.900 --> 00:13:42.795 And today, we have the added that was thirty years ago, forty years ago. 00:13:42.875 --> 00:13:46.975 Today, we have the added problem of misinformation and some of it deliberate. 00:13:49.115 --> 00:13:52.735 This is the last thing we wanna show up and do is talk to a robot. 00:13:53.115 --> 00:13:57.615 Like, when we're trying to sort through it all, we're gonna need more. 00:14:00.160 --> 00:14:01.200 I put this picture. 00:14:01.200 --> 00:14:05.060 People are familiar with the film Napoleon Dynamite. 00:14:08.240 --> 00:14:09.440 Well, I wanna say two things. 00:14:09.440 --> 00:14:14.355 One is feel free to use the chat to tell me if you're connecting with what I'm saying. 00:14:14.355 --> 00:14:16.755 You could put question marks. 00:14:16.755 --> 00:14:24.615 You could put smiley faces, like, just some way to know if I'm on track or if people are are piecing out. 00:14:26.115 --> 00:14:26.435 Okay. 00:14:26.435 --> 00:14:28.115 But I put yes. 00:14:28.115 --> 00:14:28.615 Pedro. 00:14:28.675 --> 00:14:29.575 Vote for Pedro. 00:14:30.890 --> 00:14:34.430 So what we get out of AI is only gonna be as good as your prompts. 00:14:35.850 --> 00:14:42.670 So in this case, Pedro thought the way to to win a win a woman's heart was to bake her a cake. 00:14:43.370 --> 00:14:43.770 Right? 00:14:43.770 --> 00:14:50.255 So we're not gonna get very far with it if if we're just not even asking it good questions. 00:14:51.675 --> 00:14:54.635 So I think that has become okay. 00:14:54.635 --> 00:14:55.035 Sorry. 00:14:55.035 --> 00:14:55.535 Yep. 00:14:55.675 --> 00:14:55.915 Yeah. 00:14:55.915 --> 00:14:57.755 So how are your prompting skills? 00:14:57.755 --> 00:15:00.335 Like, are you even able to talk to it very well? 00:15:01.020 --> 00:15:10.140 In my experience, very few clients come in even knowing what the right questions are, and it really helps when they just give up on that. 00:15:10.140 --> 00:15:12.400 So I I all I know is that I'm stuck. 00:15:12.620 --> 00:15:14.540 All I know is something's not working. 00:15:14.540 --> 00:15:16.240 Can you help me figure it out? 00:15:16.565 --> 00:15:19.625 That tends to be kinda one of the better starting places. 00:15:20.565 --> 00:15:23.285 At times, I even fill in those blanks for them. 00:15:23.285 --> 00:15:23.765 Like, hey. 00:15:23.765 --> 00:15:24.565 We're in prison. 00:15:24.565 --> 00:15:25.465 You're in prison. 00:15:25.765 --> 00:15:29.205 Like, this is is this where you thought your life was gonna go? 00:15:29.205 --> 00:15:30.505 How did you end up here? 00:15:31.610 --> 00:15:39.130 And in that environment in particular, it's amazing how many people would say things like, oh, but this is my last time or, hey. 00:15:39.130 --> 00:15:40.830 I'm never coming back here again. 00:15:40.970 --> 00:15:44.750 And I'm like, oh, do you know the difference between a wish and a plan? 00:15:45.450 --> 00:15:47.045 And And they'd be like, what do you mean? 00:15:47.585 --> 00:15:49.505 Like, well, a wish is just like, yeah. 00:15:49.505 --> 00:15:53.125 You hope I never come back here, but a plan is, like, real steps. 00:15:53.345 --> 00:16:00.645 Like, like, really figuring out what trips me up because nobody in there meant to end up there. 00:16:01.460 --> 00:16:05.160 There's so much, more to it. 00:16:05.460 --> 00:16:15.135 And so all the back and forth that has to happen the the other reason I put the Pedro thing is I in preparation for this talk, I I threw out to Alexa, hey. 00:16:15.135 --> 00:16:16.115 And she might answer. 00:16:16.175 --> 00:16:17.475 I just used her name. 00:16:18.175 --> 00:16:19.135 But I threw out, hey. 00:16:19.135 --> 00:16:22.195 I'm thinking that maybe learning guitar would improve my marriage. 00:16:22.975 --> 00:16:25.155 And she doesn't say, well, that's a dumb idea. 00:16:25.535 --> 00:16:27.555 It's always, like, this really positive. 00:16:27.695 --> 00:16:36.330 And I'm not saying it's a dumb idea, but it's this weird thing that she's kinda programmed to be, like, super supportive and not very critical thinking. 00:16:37.110 --> 00:16:39.270 Like, there's just a lot still wrong with it all. 00:16:39.270 --> 00:16:45.315 So we have to be really be be careful of the awareness. 00:16:47.295 --> 00:16:50.035 Like, one day, I I always get book title ideas. 00:16:50.095 --> 00:16:50.575 I don't know. 00:16:50.575 --> 00:16:56.995 I'm never gonna have time to write them all, but I kinda wanna write one that would be called rediscovering the power of doubt. 00:16:58.940 --> 00:17:11.260 Because in the prison environment, I would hear horror stories about attorneys that just I'm sure they were just overworked, but they seem to do a really lousy job defending the guy. 00:17:11.260 --> 00:17:13.600 These were all men in a male male prison. 00:17:14.425 --> 00:17:18.125 I was like, don't they remember to doubt whether they have the whole story? 00:17:18.345 --> 00:17:22.525 Like, because our especially in therapy, clients are leaving all sorts of things out. 00:17:23.145 --> 00:17:28.840 That's one of the problems with PTSD is they actually don't even remember so many factors. 00:17:28.840 --> 00:17:33.020 Like, they'll just tell you, oh, I'm I'm really upset at myself because I killed a guy. 00:17:33.480 --> 00:17:38.520 And you go pulling the thread, and it turns out, oh, so you didn't just go randomly kill someone. 00:17:38.520 --> 00:17:39.900 You were sent to war. 00:17:40.505 --> 00:17:42.045 You were in a war zone. 00:17:42.105 --> 00:17:42.345 Okay. 00:17:42.345 --> 00:17:43.705 And how much sleep had you gotten? 00:17:43.705 --> 00:17:52.185 And how much and so you have to help them include pieces that they don't even think count or or anyway, there's just so much. 00:17:52.185 --> 00:17:57.210 So we're gonna often get a lot of superficial stupid ideas like, well, let's bake a cake. 00:17:57.750 --> 00:17:57.990 Yeah. 00:17:57.990 --> 00:18:03.530 It might help something somewhere, but there's usually, like, a bigger context missing. 00:18:03.990 --> 00:18:08.730 And I don't know that AI is gonna help us fill in context and stuff. 00:18:09.905 --> 00:18:10.225 Alright. 00:18:10.225 --> 00:18:15.605 We do know that getting stuff off our chest helps telling other people. 00:18:15.825 --> 00:18:18.325 Now that's actually one of the biggest barriers. 00:18:19.345 --> 00:18:23.100 It's why there's so much isolation is because people are afraid to do that. 00:18:23.100 --> 00:18:24.300 They don't know when to do it. 00:18:24.300 --> 00:18:26.160 They don't know how to prepare listeners. 00:18:26.780 --> 00:18:28.300 They don't know how to say, hey. 00:18:28.300 --> 00:18:32.300 I I need to share some really deep stuff, but here's what I don't want. 00:18:32.300 --> 00:18:33.420 I don't want advice. 00:18:33.420 --> 00:18:34.480 I don't want judgment. 00:18:34.780 --> 00:18:35.420 I don't want this. 00:18:35.420 --> 00:18:36.320 I don't want that. 00:18:37.585 --> 00:18:40.485 But the doing and and so it can backfire. 00:18:40.545 --> 00:18:47.925 So a lot of people have disclosed in the wrong settings at the wrong times to the wrong people and end up even more isolated. 00:18:48.145 --> 00:18:54.750 So this stuff is tricky, and you do need some you know, I I come to this. 00:18:54.750 --> 00:18:57.170 I was gonna say expertise, but not a lot. 00:18:57.550 --> 00:18:59.070 Like, I don't wanna say, okay. 00:18:59.070 --> 00:19:01.170 Everybody stay dependent on therapists. 00:19:02.190 --> 00:19:05.090 It isn't about creating and maintaining dependencies. 00:19:05.710 --> 00:19:11.295 It's more about understanding the limitations of the instrumentation that we depend on. 00:19:13.835 --> 00:19:14.315 Okay. 00:19:14.315 --> 00:19:17.055 So sharing is is helpful in the right settings. 00:19:18.075 --> 00:19:21.850 This is not a talk where I brought in all the stats and all that stuff. 00:19:21.850 --> 00:19:24.010 I know you're gonna have four or five more talks. 00:19:24.010 --> 00:19:26.590 You can ask AI to give you that stuff. 00:19:26.890 --> 00:19:29.390 This is more somebody's real world experience. 00:19:29.450 --> 00:19:32.750 Because one of the biggest problems really is solitary confinement. 00:19:33.050 --> 00:19:34.990 This is not what my prison looked like. 00:19:35.715 --> 00:19:39.335 There I mean, there's so much backlash against solitary confinement. 00:19:39.395 --> 00:19:40.455 There's so much confusion. 00:19:41.715 --> 00:19:47.655 If I was in prison, I'd actually wanna be alone a lot, with some of the social company there. 00:19:48.435 --> 00:19:52.420 But human beings are ending up extremely isolated. 00:19:52.420 --> 00:19:55.460 And I think that's another of the fears that we're talking about here. 00:19:55.460 --> 00:19:57.320 It's like, what is going on in society? 00:19:57.940 --> 00:20:01.720 What is going on when we make it so easy to not need anybody? 00:20:03.375 --> 00:20:10.195 It it there's a backfiring of ending up just because you can be alone, should you always be alone? 00:20:10.335 --> 00:20:12.895 Those are the questions we need to kind of explore. 00:20:12.895 --> 00:20:16.975 And then what are the the ways yeah. 00:20:16.975 --> 00:20:18.915 We're isolating from each other. 00:20:19.830 --> 00:20:21.930 Anyway, I'm getting confused on that thread. 00:20:22.470 --> 00:20:27.770 As far as the profession's concerned is they are trying to turn us into bots. 00:20:28.070 --> 00:20:33.415 They are trying to make this field like a manufacturing endeavor. 00:20:34.035 --> 00:20:37.975 In several workplaces, we've had to talk about RVUs. 00:20:38.275 --> 00:20:40.195 What's your relative value unit? 00:20:40.195 --> 00:20:41.335 How much are you producing? 00:20:42.355 --> 00:20:44.515 How many widgets are you cranking out? 00:20:44.515 --> 00:20:45.495 What's your productivity? 00:20:48.010 --> 00:20:53.550 Now I'm not someone who doesn't, like, understand or respect that. 00:20:54.810 --> 00:20:55.870 Like, I'm entrepreneurial. 00:20:56.170 --> 00:20:58.810 I try to start things that I hope make money. 00:20:58.810 --> 00:21:02.195 I'm terrible at it, but I like thinking about it. 00:21:02.415 --> 00:21:05.375 So I am very sensitive to, like yeah. 00:21:05.375 --> 00:21:14.195 When I started trying to do t shirts, I really wanna do the eco friendly, but then those are 12, and these guys can get you the shirt for 5. 00:21:14.660 --> 00:21:16.580 I can't sell a shirt for $30. 00:21:16.580 --> 00:21:20.040 So, like, all this stuff does have to make sense at some point. 00:21:21.060 --> 00:21:23.160 So I'm not just like kumbaya. 00:21:24.500 --> 00:21:27.480 Like, there's an understanding, but we need to figure it out better. 00:21:27.875 --> 00:21:46.600 A theme I didn't make a slide on, but I love this thing that I've heard is something Einstein said, which is that if you give me a if you give me one hour to solve a problem, I'm gonna spend fifty five of those minutes trying to understand what the problem even is, and then I'm gonna solve it in five. 00:21:47.860 --> 00:21:58.815 I think most of from what I can see of how businesses are run nowadays and organizations, I think it's it's the opposite is what's happening. 00:21:59.675 --> 00:22:01.275 People are spending five minutes. 00:22:01.275 --> 00:22:08.495 They think they understand the problem, and they're coming up with solutions that every time they fix one thing, they break three more. 00:22:08.710 --> 00:22:10.070 It's really crazy. 00:22:10.070 --> 00:22:12.970 And that's even some of the legal stuff that I saw in the prisons. 00:22:13.670 --> 00:22:18.330 The amount of stuff people have sued for, and we seem to have the worst lawyers, they lose everything. 00:22:18.390 --> 00:22:22.010 So everything was resulting in more and more rules, more checkboxes. 00:22:22.545 --> 00:22:27.845 And the more check boxes and the more documentation, the fewer people a therapist is gonna see. 00:22:28.545 --> 00:22:34.565 So all this stuff, we really have to be careful about how much backfires when we go to fix something. 00:22:37.300 --> 00:22:37.620 Okay. 00:22:37.620 --> 00:22:39.960 Again, I go on many, many tangents. 00:22:41.860 --> 00:22:43.060 And then okay. 00:22:43.060 --> 00:22:43.460 So yeah. 00:22:43.460 --> 00:22:45.540 And they're putting these these meters on us. 00:22:45.540 --> 00:22:53.805 I remember when I finished grad school and got my first job, it was at a place where they wanted thirty minute sessions. 00:22:55.705 --> 00:22:56.905 It was thirty minute sessions. 00:22:56.905 --> 00:23:00.105 And in the interview, I was very open, like, don't people burn out here? 00:23:00.105 --> 00:23:00.825 How are you doing? 00:23:00.825 --> 00:23:01.785 That's that's crazy. 00:23:01.785 --> 00:23:06.290 And they were like, oh, you know, if they all show up, we're gonna reduce that. 00:23:06.290 --> 00:23:11.190 You're not gonna have 14 people a day, but there was a risk of 10. 00:23:11.890 --> 00:23:13.570 It was it was pretty intense. 00:23:13.570 --> 00:23:15.730 Luckily, there were a lot of no shows in that environment. 00:23:15.730 --> 00:23:23.475 So they kinda knew what they were doing in terms of like, I could give an extra fifteen minutes if I could see on my schedule if someone didn't show up. 00:23:23.475 --> 00:23:26.535 So peep some people were getting forty five minutes, even an hour. 00:23:26.915 --> 00:23:28.115 Other people, thirty. 00:23:28.115 --> 00:23:29.175 Like, it just depended. 00:23:29.315 --> 00:23:31.635 And now, really, I've shifted my views on this. 00:23:31.635 --> 00:23:33.005 Some people need five or 10. 00:23:33.005 --> 00:23:52.675 I I was gonna say if there are any priests on this, I wish you could create your calendar software so that, you know, you you have a two hour block of the five minute confessions for the people that don't need all your attend you know, don't need an hour, but then you offer a few hour long and improve on some of how that is done. 00:23:52.675 --> 00:23:55.795 I think there's a lot of variability with the inmates. 00:23:55.795 --> 00:23:59.175 Very few needed an hour or even forty five. 00:23:59.555 --> 00:24:03.095 There were some weeks where, you know, the five minutes good enough. 00:24:03.930 --> 00:24:09.230 Anyway, there's a lot of variability, and so some of the technology might help us solve some of this. 00:24:09.530 --> 00:24:11.130 But the amount of pressure is crazy. 00:24:11.130 --> 00:24:11.370 Okay. 00:24:11.370 --> 00:24:15.390 Now some of the ideas that are coming out is, why don't we clone a guy? 00:24:17.425 --> 00:24:28.225 Like, I thought this was a joke when I saw it, but look at how many outlets were covering this that Mark Zuckerberg doesn't have enough time to meet with everybody. 00:24:28.225 --> 00:24:32.880 And so if you wanna meet with him, you're gonna be able to meet with his AI. 00:24:32.880 --> 00:24:34.500 And I'm like, I don't know. 00:24:35.200 --> 00:24:37.380 More than one of someone's kind of a lot. 00:24:38.560 --> 00:24:42.100 So, somehow, I don't think that's really the answer. 00:24:46.105 --> 00:24:46.425 Okay. 00:24:46.425 --> 00:24:53.485 Now, again, I wanna be careful of not just being all about lamenting, oh, those better days. 00:24:53.545 --> 00:24:55.885 Like, everything was so much better in the past. 00:24:56.025 --> 00:24:57.165 Like, come on. 00:24:57.785 --> 00:25:00.045 That is only true until winter. 00:25:02.360 --> 00:25:02.840 You know? 00:25:02.840 --> 00:25:04.220 I don't wanna have an outhouse. 00:25:05.640 --> 00:25:16.540 I stole this line from a an ad on a it was a photo I saw years ago for a camping goods store, and it just said now is the winter of our discount tents. 00:25:17.515 --> 00:25:22.655 But, like, let's not just be about lamenting or trying to slow down progress. 00:25:22.795 --> 00:25:27.115 Like, it's more about figuring out where things belong because I want my own bathroom. 00:25:27.115 --> 00:25:28.415 I want my own home. 00:25:29.080 --> 00:25:33.260 Unfortunately, some are gonna look like this, but, like, we need to get people housed. 00:25:33.400 --> 00:25:43.580 And, you know, you need a certain amount of technology and progress, in my opinion, that it's worth some trade off because I'd rather have this than the outhouse. 00:25:44.835 --> 00:25:45.335 Okay. 00:25:46.275 --> 00:25:48.855 And I also wanna say this isn't just happening in therapy. 00:25:48.915 --> 00:25:55.335 Obviously, these concepts, the dehumanization is has been going on a long time. 00:25:55.635 --> 00:26:00.350 So I wanna be fair and say this isn't just happening in health care. 00:26:00.350 --> 00:26:04.530 Like, education did it a long time ago with these massive classroom experiences. 00:26:08.590 --> 00:26:16.965 So the inhumanity can just creep in anywhere, and we have to go kind of figuring out where is it creeping in in my practice or in my life. 00:26:20.705 --> 00:26:22.785 Are people just becoming files for me? 00:26:22.785 --> 00:26:24.005 Are people just cases? 00:26:24.145 --> 00:26:30.390 Like, that's kind of the ugly side, especially of working in hospitals and prisons and I guess universities. 00:26:31.490 --> 00:26:35.270 There's such a danger that people become numbers, people become cases. 00:26:36.210 --> 00:26:38.150 And so we need to find ways. 00:26:38.210 --> 00:26:41.185 And I'm not saying it's avoidable in a sense. 00:26:42.765 --> 00:26:43.245 I don't know. 00:26:43.245 --> 00:26:44.685 I might have more ideas on that. 00:26:44.685 --> 00:26:52.225 But but it's nice to look at a picture, excuse me, like this once in a while and be like, wow, those all represent human beings. 00:26:53.360 --> 00:26:55.200 And do I consider that? 00:26:55.200 --> 00:26:56.500 Do I reflect on that? 00:26:57.040 --> 00:27:02.580 And then my cynical line at the end is people are going to find ways to get individual attention. 00:27:02.640 --> 00:27:09.065 I think we need to put that individual attention really early in life because this is the fallback. 00:27:09.125 --> 00:27:19.125 This is the fallback is you know, people in prison were hurt, and they grew up with the philosophy, oh, I'm actually on my own. 00:27:19.125 --> 00:27:20.885 Nobody really cares about me. 00:27:20.885 --> 00:27:25.950 Everybody's just controlling and doing their thing, so I'm just gonna do the same. 00:27:25.950 --> 00:27:29.330 They don't have an eloquent philosophy about it, but it's in the behavior. 00:27:30.590 --> 00:27:34.670 A lot of times, they don't even know what antisocial personality is. 00:27:34.670 --> 00:27:38.525 Like, they're they've heard the phrase a lot, and they think it means, yeah. 00:27:38.525 --> 00:27:39.365 I don't like these people. 00:27:39.365 --> 00:27:40.125 I wanna be alone. 00:27:40.125 --> 00:27:40.865 I'm antisocial. 00:27:41.885 --> 00:27:42.685 And so explain. 00:27:42.685 --> 00:27:42.845 No. 00:27:42.845 --> 00:27:44.285 It's that you reject the rules. 00:27:44.285 --> 00:27:45.645 You don't play by the rules. 00:27:45.645 --> 00:27:47.985 You you wanna be the an exception. 00:27:48.445 --> 00:27:49.840 I think, well, that doesn't apply to me. 00:27:49.840 --> 00:27:51.220 I don't have to wait in line. 00:27:51.280 --> 00:27:52.740 Anyway, whole other category. 00:27:54.240 --> 00:27:57.780 But so there's dehumanization happening in so many contexts. 00:27:58.480 --> 00:28:06.385 I will gripe a little more about this, which is sad at you could spend twenty years in prison and never even get a full course of therapy. 00:28:06.765 --> 00:28:08.385 And not because there aren't the resources. 00:28:08.525 --> 00:28:09.825 I mean, that's some of it. 00:28:11.885 --> 00:28:15.965 But it's also like, especially the hospital I worked at in New York, there literally wasn't time. 00:28:15.965 --> 00:28:33.275 They were moving those people around from group to group, these mandatory things, and it was just it was so bizarre that there wasn't it was extremely hard to have a regular meeting time with anybody to for a course of twelve weeks, let's say, and do an evidence based therapy or something. 00:28:33.575 --> 00:28:35.275 It just wasn't set up for it. 00:28:35.655 --> 00:28:47.780 And so back to the idea that there are so many things in society that we're answering they're like solutions to who knows like, I'm not even sure what the problem was. 00:28:47.780 --> 00:28:49.140 I mean, this is an obvious one. 00:28:49.140 --> 00:28:51.800 Somebody needed to get locked up because they were dangerous. 00:28:54.580 --> 00:28:55.620 But I don't know. 00:28:55.620 --> 00:29:00.405 I I hope the future is better, but we gotta really start asking, what was the purpose of this thing again? 00:29:00.405 --> 00:29:01.525 Why why do we have this? 00:29:01.525 --> 00:29:08.905 These these were the old mental hospitals that were closed down that I don't know if at some point or it's looking like things might get reopened. 00:29:10.805 --> 00:29:13.225 But so the dehumanization is a theme. 00:29:13.700 --> 00:29:24.600 And then the awareness, like, why is in many circles someone considered a hero for killing the health care CEO the CEO of UnitedHealthcare? 00:29:26.205 --> 00:29:29.805 And, again, we can go small and say, oh, naughty man. 00:29:29.805 --> 00:29:31.005 He shouldn't have done that. 00:29:31.005 --> 00:29:32.305 Or we could say, wait. 00:29:33.245 --> 00:29:44.140 The number of people that were enthused by this is an indicator that he may not have had the authority to do what he did, but maybe the guy that got it deserved what he got. 00:29:44.140 --> 00:29:48.300 Like, it may not have actually been an injustice, but a problem of authority. 00:29:48.300 --> 00:29:53.280 Who has the authority to say something very evil is going on in their bodies? 00:29:54.855 --> 00:29:56.235 They're just not being counted. 00:29:58.775 --> 00:29:59.275 Alright. 00:29:59.735 --> 00:29:59.975 Alright. 00:29:59.975 --> 00:30:05.115 So now as therapists and I'm going back and forth because I realized how varied the attendees are. 00:30:07.250 --> 00:30:08.930 Actually, let me look at that question real quick. 00:30:08.930 --> 00:30:11.430 What percentage of inmates with mental health? 00:30:12.370 --> 00:30:15.990 What are your thoughts about mental okay. 00:30:16.370 --> 00:30:17.890 I do wanna address that. 00:30:17.890 --> 00:30:18.530 So alright. 00:30:18.530 --> 00:30:27.885 The way it was organized is there was there's something called EOP, the enhanced outpatient. 00:30:28.265 --> 00:30:31.705 So they have the state hospitals and then coming down the level. 00:30:31.705 --> 00:30:43.680 The highest level we had at the level four maximum security facility is EOP, And there is a whole yard of people, and each thing holds could hold a 100, but they try to do single cell. 00:30:44.780 --> 00:30:45.420 So I don't know. 00:30:45.420 --> 00:30:45.900 What was that? 00:30:45.900 --> 00:30:47.840 500 300 people in there maybe? 00:30:48.460 --> 00:30:48.860 I don't know. 00:30:48.860 --> 00:30:49.420 It's more. 00:30:49.420 --> 00:30:57.835 I I worked in that for a year and then another year and three months in the step down from that, more maintenance level. 00:30:58.615 --> 00:31:02.235 But there was an issue there too where there's a lot of faking. 00:31:02.375 --> 00:31:14.470 So there's a lot of bad thinking in terms of, oh, if I say I have a mental condition, it gets me this other housing, and that gets me away from these enemies because I bought a lot of drugs I haven't paid for yet. 00:31:14.470 --> 00:31:17.690 So they had drug debt, and their lives were in danger. 00:31:18.710 --> 00:31:24.545 So they're using mental health as an excuse, but then you eat with them and there's it's fake. 00:31:24.765 --> 00:31:27.965 So but you're not allowed to call it that because then you get sued. 00:31:27.965 --> 00:31:34.145 Like, if you call it malingering, like, there's just it's a very thorny, complex environment. 00:31:37.890 --> 00:31:47.750 And so this is tricky too because whenever they got in trouble within the prison, we were constantly there's a rotation system to be assigned to evaluate, was mental health involved? 00:31:49.465 --> 00:31:52.285 And sometimes I was like, how could it not be involved? 00:31:52.425 --> 00:31:54.845 But what they really mean is in that moment. 00:31:55.865 --> 00:32:05.930 So if someone knowingly is acquiring drugs and it's premeditated, we're not gonna call even though, yeah, there's an addiction there, they're not gonna get a lesser punishment. 00:32:05.990 --> 00:32:07.610 There wasn't much punishment, though. 00:32:07.910 --> 00:32:13.290 But they're not gonna get off because anyway, I'm all over the place. 00:32:13.750 --> 00:32:14.570 It was tricky. 00:32:15.350 --> 00:32:25.215 I'd say a lot of people that do have mental health issues don't know it, and then there's a lot that are faking, but they need some help too. 00:32:25.915 --> 00:32:28.315 It was just kind of, like, bigger than mental health. 00:32:28.315 --> 00:32:35.120 It's sort of life journey, maybe coaching, actually, to help people understand where they're at and what their missing pieces are. 00:32:41.420 --> 00:32:41.820 No. 00:32:41.820 --> 00:32:42.320 Sorry. 00:32:42.380 --> 00:32:46.385 On that question so if if you're working in a in a prison, no. 00:32:46.385 --> 00:32:48.965 I mean, I was there to help the actual inmate. 00:32:50.705 --> 00:32:52.405 Like, I learned this at a VA. 00:32:52.945 --> 00:32:58.085 Luckily, I had one mentor that say, if it's ever a choice between the veteran or the system, choose the veteran. 00:32:58.190 --> 00:33:05.810 Like, I've learned to throw institutions under the bus because a lot of what we do is validate people's negative experience and say, yeah, this place sucks. 00:33:06.270 --> 00:33:09.970 But even knowing that, what is still within your power? 00:33:10.430 --> 00:33:11.490 Where is your autonomy? 00:33:12.225 --> 00:33:13.745 What how can you make this better? 00:33:13.745 --> 00:33:20.485 If you don't like, let's say today, the only positive thing that's gonna happen for you is a cute little bird is gonna land near you or a squirrel. 00:33:20.785 --> 00:33:25.205 If you don't take a minute to look and enjoy that, that's on you. 00:33:25.840 --> 00:33:35.460 And learning training people to be more aware of what's within their control and to stop spinning like, I had to stop spinning my wheels on trying to change Sacramento. 00:33:36.480 --> 00:33:38.320 Early on, I was like, well, this is terrible. 00:33:38.320 --> 00:33:38.880 We should train. 00:33:38.880 --> 00:33:40.820 And it's like, Sacramento didn't care. 00:33:43.285 --> 00:33:52.005 So learning, like, how to really navigate your life within what you have, what's in your control, what you're missing out on that you need to pay closer attention to. 00:33:52.005 --> 00:33:54.165 Sometimes it's that first cup of coffee in the morning. 00:33:54.165 --> 00:33:58.160 If you accidentally drink it all distracted, that's nobody else's fault. 00:33:58.300 --> 00:33:59.760 You should have savored it. 00:34:01.980 --> 00:34:09.225 Anyway, I don't know if I answered Matt's question there about myself. 00:34:09.225 --> 00:34:11.885 I mean, I don't have answers for the homelessness issue. 00:34:13.465 --> 00:34:17.645 There's a lot of separation between people that have chosen to go off the grid. 00:34:17.785 --> 00:34:25.740 They're the sophisticated people that go off the grid, meaning they buy property and they're able to build, put up solar and stuff like that. 00:34:25.740 --> 00:34:28.460 But then the people that just say, screw this. 00:34:28.460 --> 00:34:30.400 I'm not showing up for nine to five. 00:34:30.540 --> 00:34:31.920 I'm going to live on the street. 00:34:32.140 --> 00:34:35.040 The first month is nasty, but then you get used to it. 00:34:35.500 --> 00:34:38.960 There's just so much variability in who's out there. 00:34:39.285 --> 00:34:43.925 I don't know that we're anyway, I I that's gonna be a whole other talk. 00:34:43.925 --> 00:34:45.305 Let me keep going on this. 00:34:46.165 --> 00:34:48.565 So we have people asking these kind of questions. 00:34:48.565 --> 00:34:52.565 How well is AI gonna do with questions like, am I accepted? 00:34:52.565 --> 00:34:53.545 Do I have value? 00:34:53.930 --> 00:34:54.830 Am I in danger? 00:34:54.970 --> 00:34:56.990 Like, those anxiety questions. 00:34:58.010 --> 00:35:05.390 It might give you some logical explanation of anxiety, but, a, it's not gonna know what it feels like to have anxiety. 00:35:06.090 --> 00:35:14.545 It's not gonna be able to get into your subjective experience or just have that relatability to answer any of these. 00:35:14.545 --> 00:35:15.845 Like, why do I procrastinate? 00:35:17.265 --> 00:35:30.880 And, again, these things, if you develop a good enough prompt, it might help you come up with some battle plans of like, hey, can you give me 10 steps toward conquering this? 00:35:30.880 --> 00:35:34.820 And there's a certain percentage of the population that's gonna be fine with that. 00:35:35.115 --> 00:35:36.335 They're the go getters. 00:35:36.955 --> 00:35:39.055 They make goals and they pursue them. 00:35:41.275 --> 00:35:43.835 But I don't know. 00:35:43.835 --> 00:35:46.955 Again, you're sort of getting you're back to, like, great. 00:35:46.955 --> 00:35:55.480 Now you've helped the people that were fine with the giant lecture hall and never had any problems with how the system is set up to help those people succeed. 00:35:55.480 --> 00:36:01.880 The people that are fine with this way of doing k through 12 are still the ones succeeding that way. 00:36:01.880 --> 00:36:11.815 Like, we're obviously missing huge numbers of people that we're they're just not we're not helping them succeed and to answer these questions at that more individual level. 00:36:13.715 --> 00:36:18.420 As humans, I think we love delving into this because we struggle with these things. 00:36:18.660 --> 00:36:21.060 Especially, I I got very interested in this one. 00:36:21.060 --> 00:36:23.620 Why can't I remember stuff that I wanna remember? 00:36:23.620 --> 00:36:24.840 Why can't I focus? 00:36:25.460 --> 00:36:28.200 And yet, why are there some things I can't forget? 00:36:29.140 --> 00:36:31.960 I was like, There's this whole ADHD side. 00:36:32.135 --> 00:36:34.955 I can't focus here, but I can't forget this stuff. 00:36:36.455 --> 00:36:41.515 And that told me, well, each is not only a deficit but might also be a resource. 00:36:42.055 --> 00:36:44.955 Wouldn't it be great if I could move that muscle over to here? 00:36:45.680 --> 00:36:46.960 Like, what's getting in the way? 00:36:46.960 --> 00:36:52.660 And that's the type of stuff I get very curious about and and wanna figure out I wanna help people access. 00:36:53.600 --> 00:37:05.735 So, like, that mindfulness exercise we did at the beginning wasn't just to prove I'm a therapist or it's like the idea that if you come in with all sorts of baggage, you're you're gonna be divided when you're trying to listen to me. 00:37:05.735 --> 00:37:09.355 Are there little techniques we can use to put some of the baggage down? 00:37:10.070 --> 00:37:13.770 And it turns out that just acknowledging stuff is a big one. 00:37:15.910 --> 00:37:17.930 Like, there's one I love. 00:37:18.150 --> 00:37:21.050 I I use this example with with inmates, with men. 00:37:21.350 --> 00:37:31.555 I use, like, a sports analogy because a lot of them grew up thinking real men don't have emotions or don't talk about emotions, all that nonsense. 00:37:31.555 --> 00:37:33.095 Real men just suck it up. 00:37:34.275 --> 00:37:37.075 And some of them would tear up when I would use this example. 00:37:37.075 --> 00:37:38.355 I'd be like, oh, okay. 00:37:38.355 --> 00:37:40.130 But like, let's say there's a kid. 00:37:40.130 --> 00:37:43.830 Let's say you're a coach and your kid's on the team, and he gets hurt. 00:37:44.770 --> 00:37:47.010 And he's like, I need to sit out. 00:37:47.010 --> 00:37:47.910 I got hurt. 00:37:48.690 --> 00:37:50.850 If you say, oh, don't be a wimp. 00:37:50.850 --> 00:37:51.810 Get back in there. 00:37:51.810 --> 00:37:52.790 Suck it up. 00:37:53.575 --> 00:37:57.275 You're risking that now the kid is gonna hate the sport and hate you. 00:37:58.295 --> 00:38:03.015 If you lean in the other direction and say, oh my gosh, that sounds serious. 00:38:03.015 --> 00:38:03.575 You're hurt? 00:38:03.575 --> 00:38:03.895 Okay. 00:38:03.895 --> 00:38:05.035 You better sit down. 00:38:05.255 --> 00:38:07.515 Why don't you sit out for a while? 00:38:07.950 --> 00:38:13.890 And then you say, actually, I'm thinking you might need to sit out the rest of the season because this sounds really serious. 00:38:14.350 --> 00:38:17.170 I think a lot of kids are going to be like, wait, what? 00:38:18.030 --> 00:38:19.090 I'm good now. 00:38:20.830 --> 00:38:27.615 All they needed was a little bit of validation and a little bit of a a space to make up their own mind. 00:38:28.235 --> 00:38:34.655 And the way you give someone that space is by taking them uber seriously so that something flips over. 00:38:35.115 --> 00:38:41.820 Because in my experience, the thinking doesn't change if you're still trying to prove, no. 00:38:41.820 --> 00:38:42.700 But I'm really hurt. 00:38:42.700 --> 00:38:42.940 No. 00:38:42.940 --> 00:38:44.060 But I'm you don't understand. 00:38:44.060 --> 00:38:45.040 I'm really hurt. 00:38:45.180 --> 00:38:47.840 Like, if I'm still trying to prove that, nothing's gonna change. 00:38:48.300 --> 00:38:52.335 But if we lean in the other direction, new objectivity comes. 00:38:52.395 --> 00:38:53.775 So I use this for depression. 00:38:53.915 --> 00:38:57.695 Like, man, when you don't wanna get up in the morning, you don't wanna go to work. 00:38:57.915 --> 00:39:03.755 And, you know, you could you could, I forget what that's called, waffle there for, like, three hours. 00:39:03.755 --> 00:39:05.195 I don't wanna go, but I should go. 00:39:05.195 --> 00:39:05.915 I don't wanna go. 00:39:05.915 --> 00:39:06.690 I should go. 00:39:06.850 --> 00:39:08.290 It's better to say, screw it. 00:39:08.290 --> 00:39:09.590 I'm not going to work today. 00:39:10.610 --> 00:39:12.310 Something about that feels amazing. 00:39:12.690 --> 00:39:13.970 Let's say, I'm not going in. 00:39:13.970 --> 00:39:15.270 I just got a day off. 00:39:15.330 --> 00:39:16.210 This is awesome. 00:39:16.210 --> 00:39:17.510 I am not going in. 00:39:17.730 --> 00:39:18.130 Wow. 00:39:18.130 --> 00:39:19.330 What am I gonna do today? 00:39:19.330 --> 00:39:20.450 And I already feel better. 00:39:20.450 --> 00:39:21.590 I feel more rested. 00:39:21.935 --> 00:39:23.395 A big load is off. 00:39:24.255 --> 00:39:28.655 And within two minutes, I'm already like, but is this how I wanna waste a vacation day? 00:39:28.655 --> 00:39:30.355 Don't I wanna take a real trip? 00:39:30.495 --> 00:39:31.295 Oh, you know what? 00:39:31.295 --> 00:39:32.755 I think I'm gonna go to work. 00:39:33.535 --> 00:39:38.320 That second order thinking would have never come if I stayed in the waffle stage. 00:39:38.700 --> 00:39:48.080 So sometimes it's better to just put an idea to rest with some decision, even if it's a bad decision, caveats, legal claimers, whatever. 00:39:48.300 --> 00:39:53.395 But sometimes it's good to play with going to an extreme. 00:39:54.655 --> 00:40:00.335 I use the extreme thing a lot because it's what anxiety doesn't it's how anxiety works. 00:40:00.335 --> 00:40:04.195 Anxiety works by making you afraid and making some things unthinkable. 00:40:05.310 --> 00:40:11.170 So if we have a game plan for the unthinkable, then the thing isn't as scary. 00:40:11.230 --> 00:40:12.350 It's when we're like, oh my god. 00:40:12.350 --> 00:40:13.630 I couldn't even think of that. 00:40:13.630 --> 00:40:14.510 Oh, what? 00:40:14.510 --> 00:40:15.010 Ah. 00:40:15.550 --> 00:40:16.530 We get paralyzed. 00:40:17.310 --> 00:40:21.195 So we need to sometimes just say it. 00:40:21.735 --> 00:40:29.815 I remember one of my sisters was getting a PhD, and I and it sound and I was like and she was so nervous preparing for her defense. 00:40:29.815 --> 00:40:31.015 I was like, oh my gosh. 00:40:31.015 --> 00:40:31.575 I don't know. 00:40:31.575 --> 00:40:38.470 You better pass because I don't know if I could if if you don't pass, I don't know if I'm still going to love you. 00:40:38.470 --> 00:40:42.060 And she laughed and that just kind of lightened it up. 00:40:42.060 --> 00:40:43.366 Like, Okay, that's ridiculous. 00:40:43.366 --> 00:40:44.345 This is silly. 00:40:44.345 --> 00:40:48.915 So there are times when it helps to just kind of pop those bubbles. 00:40:49.155 --> 00:40:50.935 Because again, back to these questions. 00:40:51.155 --> 00:41:05.490 And then at a prison, people have been told they're monsters, like this thing you did is horrific, or someone coming back from war or things in our culture that people are told, well, you gotta choose something, so do something. 00:41:05.490 --> 00:41:07.490 And then later you're like, oh my gosh. 00:41:07.490 --> 00:41:08.610 Did I actually do that? 00:41:08.610 --> 00:41:10.050 Like, there's stuff. 00:41:10.050 --> 00:41:10.290 Right? 00:41:10.290 --> 00:41:11.430 And then there's OCD. 00:41:11.570 --> 00:41:12.530 Did I turn off the stove? 00:41:12.530 --> 00:41:22.045 There's we're all walking around with something, and I don't know that AI it's gonna be able to offer pieces, but not the bigger piece. 00:41:22.345 --> 00:41:23.385 This is a long question. 00:41:23.385 --> 00:41:25.385 I don't Loretta, I'm gonna try to read that. 00:41:25.385 --> 00:41:26.765 Earlier, you mentioned trauma. 00:41:32.870 --> 00:41:33.510 That's awesome. 00:41:33.510 --> 00:41:34.630 You need to lean into it. 00:41:34.630 --> 00:41:38.410 You need to go toward it. 00:41:38.550 --> 00:41:44.490 One of the key symptoms that maintains PTSD is avoidance, and I'm mentioning that in the middle. 00:41:44.915 --> 00:41:45.235 Yeah. 00:41:45.235 --> 00:41:46.195 People need the space. 00:41:46.195 --> 00:41:54.355 They need to get it off their chest, and they need to know it's okay to say those things, that there's so much that is okay to say and deal with. 00:41:54.355 --> 00:41:59.710 Let me yeah. 00:41:59.710 --> 00:42:00.670 The other oops. 00:42:00.670 --> 00:42:03.790 The other problem right. 00:42:03.790 --> 00:42:05.310 We need a personal response. 00:42:05.310 --> 00:42:06.830 That is gonna get to the heart of this. 00:42:06.830 --> 00:42:09.090 Am I talking to a person or a robot? 00:42:11.145 --> 00:42:14.025 I don't like fake validation. 00:42:14.025 --> 00:42:27.160 I once had a supervisor tell me after a group I led or something, she said, oh, you're really good for your level, which is something a robot could have said. 00:42:27.160 --> 00:42:36.460 And it was meant to be whatever, like empathic, but it was like, Oh my gosh, do you not realize what a backhanded coward just like, that's just weird. 00:42:37.045 --> 00:42:39.945 Like, oh, you're really improving or you're better at something now. 00:42:40.565 --> 00:42:42.665 And the robots are gonna get a lot wrong. 00:42:43.605 --> 00:42:49.925 My other quick experience on that is how much are people really gonna tell these things because everybody's listening. 00:42:49.925 --> 00:42:52.300 That's not a secret device. 00:42:52.360 --> 00:42:56.120 Like, I've started to write some apps, and I think people hesitate. 00:42:56.120 --> 00:42:57.900 I did it because it's gonna be convenient. 00:42:58.760 --> 00:43:00.280 You don't have to see 10 pages. 00:43:00.280 --> 00:43:04.600 You could just see less, and then it opens up more depending on where you wanna go. 00:43:04.600 --> 00:43:08.125 But I think people don't wanna put all their stuff on the Internet. 00:43:08.905 --> 00:43:10.665 So again, just so many questions. 00:43:10.665 --> 00:43:10.905 Alright. 00:43:10.905 --> 00:43:14.045 So what do we want from our therapists, even clergy, coaches? 00:43:14.265 --> 00:43:15.965 Like, this applies to so many. 00:43:16.505 --> 00:43:18.025 It's like, yeah, we want answers. 00:43:18.025 --> 00:43:22.730 But, like, remember when the answers were quit smoking, exercise more, lose weight? 00:43:22.870 --> 00:43:23.510 Like, gee. 00:43:23.510 --> 00:43:24.150 Thanks, doc. 00:43:24.150 --> 00:43:25.770 How much do I owe for that? 00:43:26.710 --> 00:43:28.870 So we have the high quest. 00:43:28.870 --> 00:43:31.130 So we need answers and support. 00:43:31.615 --> 00:43:41.615 In prison, I didn't have answers for how to get out of prison other than stop getting, or whatever they were called. 00:43:41.615 --> 00:43:41.935 Sorry. 00:43:41.935 --> 00:43:43.315 Stop getting the write ups. 00:43:46.260 --> 00:43:48.920 Answers were not as important in that setting as support. 00:43:49.060 --> 00:43:50.580 Like, you can get through this. 00:43:50.580 --> 00:43:56.120 Your brain, your anxiety is telling you that one more thing, and you're done. 00:43:56.580 --> 00:43:57.860 That's how anxiety works. 00:43:57.860 --> 00:43:59.400 Anxiety is a terrible scorekeeper. 00:44:00.500 --> 00:44:04.665 I also wanna write a book that would be an answer to a book called the body keeps the score. 00:44:05.045 --> 00:44:08.025 Because one problem with anxiety is it's a terrible scorekeeper. 00:44:10.005 --> 00:44:13.925 Meaning oh, let's say you buy a lottery ticket. 00:44:13.925 --> 00:44:17.360 How many lottery tickets does it take for you to stop playing the lottery? 00:44:17.500 --> 00:44:18.700 Because you're getting feedback. 00:44:18.700 --> 00:44:20.060 Like, oh, that was a waste again. 00:44:20.060 --> 00:44:20.940 Oh, that was a waste again. 00:44:20.940 --> 00:44:22.080 Oh, that was a waste again. 00:44:22.460 --> 00:44:23.680 So you need feedback. 00:44:23.820 --> 00:44:31.360 Anxiety, unfortunately, every time you're afraid of a blind corner, you do it, and there's a brief relief. 00:44:32.185 --> 00:44:35.225 Just like when you wash your hands with OCD, there's a brief relief. 00:44:35.225 --> 00:44:35.945 But guess what? 00:44:35.945 --> 00:44:38.045 You're immediately on to the next one. 00:44:38.825 --> 00:44:47.240 But if you start writing down how often you're wrong and I used to print calendars for people and say, okay. 00:44:47.240 --> 00:44:48.940 What's your biggest darkest fear? 00:44:49.880 --> 00:44:51.960 If I go to Walmart, I'm gonna get shot. 00:44:51.960 --> 00:44:53.400 That happened with a lot of veterans. 00:44:53.400 --> 00:44:54.780 Like, I can't go to Walmart. 00:44:54.920 --> 00:44:55.800 I'm gonna get shot. 00:44:55.800 --> 00:44:56.040 Okay. 00:44:56.040 --> 00:44:56.600 Write it down. 00:44:56.600 --> 00:44:58.520 And every day, you come back and you got it right. 00:44:58.520 --> 00:44:59.240 Wrong again. 00:44:59.240 --> 00:44:59.800 Wrong again. 00:44:59.800 --> 00:45:00.375 Wrong again. 00:45:00.455 --> 00:45:02.475 After seven days, you start slipping. 00:45:03.015 --> 00:45:05.015 Fourteen days, you go back and fill in the wins. 00:45:05.015 --> 00:45:10.155 You by thirty days, that thought is gone because you need to be a better scorekeeper. 00:45:12.640 --> 00:45:16.020 Again, I'm lost on why I said that, but I hope it helps someone. 00:45:16.080 --> 00:45:19.120 So we need answers and we need support, but then there's more. 00:45:19.120 --> 00:45:21.300 I kept trying to figure out there's more. 00:45:21.600 --> 00:45:22.720 Then you need tools. 00:45:22.720 --> 00:45:23.440 Well, how? 00:45:23.440 --> 00:45:23.940 What? 00:45:24.400 --> 00:45:25.360 How do I do that? 00:45:25.360 --> 00:45:26.820 I said print the calendar. 00:45:27.215 --> 00:45:28.035 Print a calendar. 00:45:28.095 --> 00:45:29.935 Find little use an app. 00:45:29.935 --> 00:45:30.335 Use this. 00:45:30.335 --> 00:45:30.895 Use that. 00:45:30.895 --> 00:45:32.195 We we need some tools. 00:45:32.895 --> 00:45:40.835 It's and I where I was ray raised as a therapist at Ole Miss, they were very against just being a supportive therapist. 00:45:40.895 --> 00:45:42.835 In prison, it was very good to be a supporter. 00:45:43.160 --> 00:45:45.980 But, you know, they're very into the evidence based practices. 00:45:46.920 --> 00:45:48.760 And so, like, I'm not just support. 00:45:48.760 --> 00:45:52.540 We're we're here to change was the emphasis, which I think is a good one. 00:45:53.240 --> 00:45:55.580 It it just depends what people are dealing with. 00:45:56.280 --> 00:46:01.645 But so in the prison, I was delivering all this. 00:46:01.645 --> 00:46:05.025 These poor guys hadn't they were getting so little respect. 00:46:05.565 --> 00:46:13.585 Because once you're in there, you do not wanna fall in the hands of a prison system because all that stuff you learn about rights and stuff, I mean, eventually. 00:46:13.725 --> 00:46:18.910 But when it comes down to, hey, CO, custody office, can I get another roll of toilet paper? 00:46:20.490 --> 00:46:22.350 That's gonna be based on that relationship. 00:46:23.930 --> 00:46:30.195 And so, there's a lot of suffering that once your rights are lost, like, so much more gets lost. 00:46:30.275 --> 00:46:31.635 That's what should be on the Billboard. 00:46:31.635 --> 00:46:32.915 Hey, kids, don't go to prison. 00:46:32.915 --> 00:46:37.075 Not because it's immoral, not because crime is bad or evil. 00:46:37.075 --> 00:46:39.175 It's because you don't want to fall into these hands. 00:46:39.875 --> 00:46:41.735 You don't want to become a case number. 00:46:42.590 --> 00:46:47.170 So half of what I was bringing in was not like a new mindfulness exercise. 00:46:47.710 --> 00:46:50.830 It was just respect, a sense of confidence. 00:46:50.830 --> 00:46:52.750 Like, I think you still have a lot to offer. 00:46:52.750 --> 00:46:53.550 You may be here. 00:46:53.550 --> 00:47:04.605 This may be what's happening in your life now, but restoring a sense of their value and dignity and even some camaraderie, if I could, not so much in that setting. 00:47:05.225 --> 00:47:05.705 Humor. 00:47:05.705 --> 00:47:07.705 Definitely, I used a lot of humor. 00:47:07.705 --> 00:47:11.085 So these are things that AI is probably not gonna give us. 00:47:11.540 --> 00:47:14.440 People are walking in with shame, confusion, guilt. 00:47:14.740 --> 00:47:21.000 And just the fact that we can offer nonjudgment is a big step, and we're ahead of AI on that. 00:47:21.540 --> 00:47:26.440 AI is very sensitive to what somebody programmed as offensive or not. 00:47:26.895 --> 00:47:30.175 I left the last one blank because we all need to figure out, wait. 00:47:30.175 --> 00:47:31.215 What do I offer? 00:47:31.215 --> 00:47:32.355 What can I offer? 00:47:36.495 --> 00:47:38.355 What's my value added proposition? 00:47:40.600 --> 00:47:41.100 Okay. 00:47:42.680 --> 00:47:49.180 So this is church lady from Saturday Night Live, and I've had this experience even on my phone when I'm trying to type some words. 00:47:49.240 --> 00:47:53.100 Like, even the phone doesn't want you to be offensive. 00:47:53.240 --> 00:47:56.385 Like, I start typing f, and it gets nervous. 00:47:56.605 --> 00:48:04.525 And you, oh, it starts hoping I'm trying to spell fudge or, you know, like all these things are trying to teach us. 00:48:04.525 --> 00:48:15.100 And it's kind of good feedback that a lot of society has become what they initially targeted as church lady, I think, has gotten you know, the Catholic church is always what do you call it? 00:48:15.100 --> 00:48:19.520 The, the pilot test of of human nature. 00:48:20.620 --> 00:48:24.935 So it has thousands of years of experience on what could go wrong. 00:48:25.475 --> 00:48:31.415 So my theory is when it became legal in 03/25, now you had money and sponsorship. 00:48:32.035 --> 00:48:32.535 Uh-oh. 00:48:32.595 --> 00:48:33.315 Career path. 00:48:33.315 --> 00:48:35.715 Like, it just some people are gonna abuse it. 00:48:35.715 --> 00:48:36.115 Right? 00:48:36.115 --> 00:48:39.590 But then you try to add corrections to these things. 00:48:39.810 --> 00:48:51.350 But so society is only just starting to make these mistakes that I wish they would study big older institutions to say, oh, how are we gonna make sure this part doesn't happen or that part doesn't happen? 00:48:53.875 --> 00:48:54.375 Alright. 00:48:56.995 --> 00:48:57.315 Okay. 00:48:57.315 --> 00:49:01.015 This is just again, it helps if you're a wounded healer. 00:49:01.635 --> 00:49:10.370 It that idea of the church lady or that AI thing, you know, these voices coming down on high, they're not gonna be relatable. 00:49:10.590 --> 00:49:20.370 They're not gonna know now I get that you don't have to have a heart condition to be a good heart surgeon, but you do have to be a pretty experienced human being. 00:49:20.830 --> 00:49:23.650 You have to know what these struggles are about. 00:49:24.725 --> 00:49:34.505 And it might help if you I'm not saying go out and commit terrible things, but it's amazing what perspectives come when you hit rock bottom. 00:49:36.405 --> 00:49:42.700 And I know in my life, I've been knocked off my high horse, and it I would never go back. 00:49:42.700 --> 00:49:53.520 Like, it's made me a much better human being and a much better therapist, and it would fit those categories of embarrassing and, like, shame and all those things that come up. 00:49:53.825 --> 00:49:57.365 But we move forward, and that's what we're trying to help clients do. 00:49:57.745 --> 00:49:58.245 Okay. 00:49:58.305 --> 00:50:06.565 This was to get if we wanted to cover more on trauma, the idea that the Pandora's box let me just see where I am in my slides. 00:50:07.350 --> 00:50:07.750 Okay. 00:50:07.750 --> 00:50:13.450 There I'm starting to get into I wasn't sure how the timing was gonna go, and I wanted to have room for discussion. 00:50:14.390 --> 00:50:38.290 That was gonna be more specific stuff on a passion of mine, which I think has a parallel with AI, where my dissertation work had to do with comparing expressive writing, which is just having people so there was a guy in the seventies named Pennebaker, who is the one that started really looking into stress and health. 00:50:38.910 --> 00:50:42.690 And does stress make your immune system go down? 00:50:43.630 --> 00:50:47.010 And he produced real evidence, great stuff. 00:50:47.085 --> 00:50:53.265 So there's been forty, now fifty years of expressive writing where it's where the whole journaling tradition comes from. 00:50:53.725 --> 00:50:58.925 And he was finding that anyway, that's gonna be a specialized area. 00:50:58.925 --> 00:51:08.660 I don't even know how long I've been talking, and I wanna kinda maybe leave room here for questions on this specific top you know, things I've already said, AI related. 00:51:09.120 --> 00:51:13.120 I think it's maybe people can someone can unmute if they wanna ask a question. 00:51:13.120 --> 00:51:19.935 Let's just it looks like I've been talking an hour, or is that just that hour might be when I connected with Natalia. 00:51:20.235 --> 00:51:21.055 I'm not sure. 00:51:23.595 --> 00:51:23.835 Yeah. 00:51:23.835 --> 00:51:25.935 It looks like we're coming up on an hour. 00:51:27.275 --> 00:51:29.135 Any burning questions, thoughts? 00:51:31.980 --> 00:51:36.240 So, doctor Alessandri, Carlos submitted two questions. 00:51:36.860 --> 00:51:48.605 What general guidelines would you offer to use AI constructively for military veterans, and what are their parallels between veteran and convict populations? 00:51:51.145 --> 00:51:51.645 Okay. 00:51:53.225 --> 00:51:54.285 I'm a bit ADHD. 00:51:54.505 --> 00:52:00.365 So if if if those are things you have on text, drop them into the thing. 00:52:03.120 --> 00:52:08.340 When you ask for guidelines, do you mean as a veteran or as a clinician guiding a veteran? 00:52:13.280 --> 00:52:15.120 So, like yeah. 00:52:15.120 --> 00:52:16.260 I'm not sure where. 00:52:18.295 --> 00:52:18.615 Okay. 00:52:18.615 --> 00:52:24.795 So if someone's looking into their own mental health and thank you for that compliment. 00:52:26.055 --> 00:52:33.290 Like, just, like, I don't know, like reading books. 00:52:33.990 --> 00:52:35.350 Some people wanna burn books. 00:52:35.350 --> 00:52:35.990 It's like, no. 00:52:35.990 --> 00:52:40.570 Look in books for what you find useful and make sense to you and that moves you forward. 00:52:41.830 --> 00:52:51.255 I think learning to ask AI questions is a whole skill set unto itself that you're only gonna get better at with time, with with practice. 00:52:53.555 --> 00:52:59.475 And I think it's a great tool for just learning, like, so I don't have to go to the library. 00:52:59.475 --> 00:53:01.255 I don't have to go find the book. 00:53:01.790 --> 00:53:04.450 It will sift a lot of information for me. 00:53:05.790 --> 00:53:08.990 But you have to have that power of doubt concept I mentioned. 00:53:08.990 --> 00:53:10.270 What is it leaving out? 00:53:10.270 --> 00:53:15.890 Like, a great prompt nowadays is ask the thing I'll just say chat g b t to critique itself. 00:53:16.805 --> 00:53:17.605 And I'm amazed. 00:53:17.605 --> 00:53:24.585 I loved when I heard that because now I ask it, critique your answer, and it tells me every reason why though everything it just said isn't gonna work. 00:53:26.245 --> 00:53:28.645 Like, I'm trying to promote my book, and I was like, okay. 00:53:28.645 --> 00:53:29.445 Give me editors. 00:53:29.445 --> 00:53:33.110 Who what editor where would read this of retirees? 00:53:33.170 --> 00:53:34.630 What are retirees reading? 00:53:35.090 --> 00:53:37.250 And then I asked, but are they gonna read it? 00:53:37.250 --> 00:53:38.290 And they're like, no. 00:53:38.290 --> 00:53:39.670 Or, like, it's crazy. 00:53:39.730 --> 00:53:43.030 So a lot of it is gonna be trial and error. 00:53:46.455 --> 00:53:48.715 I don't really necessarily have a good answer. 00:53:49.015 --> 00:53:49.495 I don't know. 00:53:49.495 --> 00:53:51.275 That one's that one's so big. 00:53:52.695 --> 00:53:57.035 Is this Natalia, were able to were you able to is that the same question? 00:53:58.310 --> 00:53:58.710 Yes. 00:53:58.710 --> 00:54:02.870 That is the same question, but Gloria just asked another one. 00:54:02.870 --> 00:54:14.835 But the second part to Carlos' question was for military veterans, and what are their parallels between veteran and convict populations? 00:54:15.695 --> 00:54:16.755 I mean, goodness. 00:54:17.455 --> 00:54:20.035 So PTSD is very common in both settings. 00:54:23.375 --> 00:54:26.975 And I have to say combat PTSD is not the hardest one, right? 00:54:26.975 --> 00:54:35.740 If you go fight enemies in a foreign land and people are shooting at you, it's unpleasant, but your mind isn't confused. 00:54:37.240 --> 00:54:48.605 Like, when you come back home, that is actually quicker to treat because you're trying to update the brain on on what's going on. 00:54:49.705 --> 00:54:52.905 And so stuff that happens at home is worse. 00:54:52.905 --> 00:54:55.485 So sexual abuse in the home is bad. 00:54:55.920 --> 00:54:59.040 Violence in prison is bad because you're still around it. 00:54:59.040 --> 00:55:00.740 Like, am I safe now? 00:55:00.880 --> 00:55:10.900 Like so when you're still in a situation, it's harder to recover than when it truly was something in the past, and I'm in a different setting now. 00:55:15.165 --> 00:55:18.045 I wanna do this quick little speech that people find helpful. 00:55:18.045 --> 00:55:23.005 And I didn't make up it's called the hand model of the brain where you teach people, like, look. 00:55:23.005 --> 00:55:24.300 This is your spinal cord. 00:55:24.300 --> 00:55:25.660 It ends in a lower brain. 00:55:25.660 --> 00:55:26.880 This is like a puppy. 00:55:26.940 --> 00:55:29.200 This is I call it my watchdog. 00:55:30.060 --> 00:55:33.120 This one controls everything that I share with animals. 00:55:33.340 --> 00:55:40.675 So my breathing, my heart rate, digestion, all the autonomic stuff, all the automatic stuff that keeps going when I'm sleeping and stuff. 00:55:40.895 --> 00:55:43.375 On top of that, you put that big red boxing glove. 00:55:43.375 --> 00:55:44.595 That's your human brain. 00:55:44.735 --> 00:55:46.755 These two brains are not always in sync. 00:55:47.055 --> 00:55:48.495 So this guy is like, what is that? 00:55:48.495 --> 00:55:50.035 What about the ah, ah, ah. 00:55:50.335 --> 00:55:56.240 And a lot of inmates and some veterans and other people are like, I need drugs. 00:55:56.240 --> 00:55:57.220 I need a cigarette. 00:55:57.360 --> 00:56:01.140 And they're letting the dog dictate the the thing, and that's backwards. 00:56:01.280 --> 00:56:04.640 This one has to become the adult and the one that's gonna say, yes. 00:56:04.640 --> 00:56:07.865 It feels like you need that, but that's not what you need right now. 00:56:07.865 --> 00:56:10.985 What we really need is something else or you know? 00:56:10.985 --> 00:56:23.300 So a gentle adult brain that's gonna help the lower brain to start making peace with reality, with, like, oh, that was a false alarm using terms like false alarm. 00:56:23.300 --> 00:56:24.100 It felt real. 00:56:24.100 --> 00:56:24.420 Yeah. 00:56:24.420 --> 00:56:26.680 It feels like I'm in danger, but am I? 00:56:27.620 --> 00:56:28.120 No. 00:56:28.180 --> 00:56:28.920 My bad. 00:56:29.140 --> 00:56:30.280 Oh, wrong again. 00:56:30.740 --> 00:56:31.860 Making a note of that. 00:56:31.860 --> 00:56:33.000 Like, oh, my bad. 00:56:33.235 --> 00:56:37.335 So that we learn to do little exposure exercises ourself. 00:56:37.395 --> 00:56:43.255 Every time I hear this noise does not equate with the trauma that I went through. 00:56:43.715 --> 00:56:47.100 Like, I I hung out at a place with police horses growing up. 00:56:47.100 --> 00:56:49.680 We would go and shovel, and they would let us ride sometimes. 00:56:50.060 --> 00:56:53.120 And I wonder, how did you prepare these horses for riot work? 00:56:53.660 --> 00:56:59.600 I mean, the poor horses had to hear a lot of gunfire, and there was no way around that until gunfire became irrelevant. 00:56:59.900 --> 00:57:02.585 That's called exposure therapy and habituation. 00:57:02.725 --> 00:57:06.725 You get used to something, but you don't get used to it if you stay afraid of it. 00:57:06.725 --> 00:57:10.905 So a lot of people are afraid to do the homework, and there's dropout from trauma therapies. 00:57:11.285 --> 00:57:12.325 I thought that was crazy too. 00:57:12.325 --> 00:57:14.905 Why are you having these people do the hardest stuff at home? 00:57:15.270 --> 00:57:16.650 They're experts at avoidance. 00:57:16.710 --> 00:57:18.330 We gotta do this stuff with them. 00:57:19.590 --> 00:57:20.810 And it's called exposure. 00:57:20.870 --> 00:57:30.755 It's it's called the imaginal exposure because you're stirring it up, but sitting with it, and then look around, smell, touch, get in touch with this environment, then dive back in, then come out. 00:57:30.755 --> 00:57:35.795 Like, you have to help the two brains reconcile that, oh, that's past stuff. 00:57:35.795 --> 00:57:36.595 It's not now. 00:57:36.595 --> 00:57:37.575 It's still unpleasant. 00:57:37.635 --> 00:57:42.375 It's sad, but it doesn't remain physical if I do the exposure part. 00:57:42.890 --> 00:57:47.610 If I, you know, put myself in situations where, okay, I'm gonna let all these nasty feelings come up. 00:57:47.610 --> 00:57:48.570 Because you know what? 00:57:48.570 --> 00:57:50.190 That's what happens when I exercise. 00:57:51.370 --> 00:57:54.090 But I realize that's not really a heart attack. 00:57:54.090 --> 00:57:56.330 I'm just running, and my heart's getting conditioned. 00:57:56.330 --> 00:57:57.950 And this sweat, it's okay. 00:57:58.005 --> 00:58:00.505 So it's okay to sweat during trauma work. 00:58:00.805 --> 00:58:02.985 It's okay to cry and blow some snot. 00:58:04.405 --> 00:58:09.145 And these are just normal processes, but they slow people down because they're so afraid. 00:58:09.525 --> 00:58:12.725 And we have to just normalize like, oh, yeah, that's just what the body does. 00:58:12.725 --> 00:58:13.545 Like, whatever. 00:58:13.790 --> 00:58:14.750 It'll it'll pass. 00:58:14.750 --> 00:58:15.870 You don't have to do it in public. 00:58:15.870 --> 00:58:19.230 Like inmates, you don't gotta go cry in the day room. 00:58:19.230 --> 00:58:20.690 Like, do it in the shower. 00:58:20.750 --> 00:58:24.930 Go do it in your pillow, but stop bottling this stuff up. 00:58:26.430 --> 00:58:26.930 Okay. 00:58:29.685 --> 00:58:35.945 And then, Talia, if you see things pressing, it how a verbal prompt could help me because, sifting through this. 00:58:37.685 --> 00:58:47.480 So Gloria asked, in dealing with AI, while it is a popular trend, and, yes, while we may need to embrace its emergence. 00:58:47.480 --> 00:58:47.640 No. 00:58:47.640 --> 00:58:48.600 I I have sorry. 00:58:48.600 --> 00:58:49.800 I'm able to see that. 00:58:49.800 --> 00:58:53.340 I'm just saying, like, if I miss one or Sure. 00:58:53.400 --> 00:58:54.120 No problem. 00:58:54.120 --> 00:59:00.060 And I'm okay with people unmuting unless you have it set that they can't unmute to make it a discussion now. 00:59:01.285 --> 00:59:04.105 It's easier to navigate in the chat. 00:59:04.725 --> 00:59:05.225 Okay. 00:59:06.405 --> 00:59:13.560 So let me oh, someone's saying, Deborah, okay. 00:59:13.560 --> 00:59:19.400 ADHD and PTSD, there's a huge overlap, and you can't you're not supposed to diagnose ADHD. 00:59:19.400 --> 00:59:23.800 When I was learning the real like, all the testing and stuff, I had a very good supervisor. 00:59:23.800 --> 00:59:27.100 He's like, if they have all this trauma and stuff, it's gonna mimic ADHD. 00:59:28.245 --> 00:59:40.745 Like, you're not so the issues with memory, if you're fearing for your life like, if you think about it, when you have PTSD, you're basically a computer with too many apps running, and the whole thing slows down. 00:59:40.980 --> 00:59:48.740 So, yeah, you're not gonna take in you're not gonna record new information very well, and you're not gonna retrieve it. 00:59:48.740 --> 00:59:50.180 Those are the two memory problems. 00:59:50.180 --> 00:59:52.740 Either it never recorded or I just can't find it. 00:59:52.740 --> 00:59:55.665 I know I used to know, but I can't find it. 00:59:55.905 --> 00:59:58.405 So all these things get kinda messy and overlapped. 00:59:58.545 --> 01:00:11.285 That's why when you do the exercises and I guess we're not gonna get to that part, but I meant to I guess, hopefully, you'll send out the PDF to all the participants with my contact info. 01:00:12.370 --> 01:00:14.450 There's some brief exercises you can do. 01:00:14.450 --> 01:00:23.350 I call it the brief trauma organizer because it's the idea that humans get bored when everything's organized. 01:00:23.825 --> 01:00:26.705 So if I'm ever gonna get bored with this stuff, I need to organize it. 01:00:26.705 --> 01:00:27.105 Like, okay. 01:00:27.105 --> 01:00:28.465 These are the events that happened. 01:00:28.465 --> 01:00:29.825 This is how I felt about it. 01:00:29.825 --> 01:00:30.625 This, this, this, this. 01:00:30.625 --> 01:00:32.165 And the more words, the better. 01:00:32.545 --> 01:00:32.865 Yes. 01:00:32.865 --> 01:00:33.585 This is not that. 01:00:33.585 --> 01:00:36.725 So I just made emotion lists so people can check them off. 01:00:37.490 --> 01:00:38.290 And they love it. 01:00:38.290 --> 01:00:40.230 Like, oh, oh, oh, it's so validating. 01:00:40.290 --> 01:00:41.590 You just see it on a page. 01:00:42.610 --> 01:00:45.170 And not just two or three words like happy, sad. 01:00:45.170 --> 01:00:45.330 No. 01:00:45.330 --> 01:00:46.230 That's barbaric. 01:00:46.370 --> 01:00:54.335 It's really getting into the nuances and the contradictory ones and telling them, yeah, you can feel opposite stuff at the same time. 01:00:54.335 --> 01:00:56.995 Like when you get a job, people say, oh, you must be so excited. 01:00:57.375 --> 01:00:59.075 The real answer, yeah, and terrified. 01:00:59.135 --> 01:01:02.915 What if I move my family across the country and I bomb it? 01:01:03.130 --> 01:01:05.150 Like, yeah, it was exciting, but it was terrifying. 01:01:05.610 --> 01:01:08.270 All this stuff is going on all the time inside of us. 01:01:09.370 --> 01:01:12.830 So AI, I know I've gotten a bit off topic. 01:01:13.530 --> 01:01:25.105 For people using it therapeutically, I don't know if it's gonna be some trial and error because, again, I'm for self help. 01:01:25.105 --> 01:01:28.725 So encouraging a client to look up some stuff, why not? 01:01:30.305 --> 01:01:37.320 Especially if they're working with you, that's great that then they're gonna be able to bring it back and bounce it off you and grow that way. 01:01:37.780 --> 01:01:43.560 I don't have anything specific recommendations because I like to make my own worksheets. 01:01:46.355 --> 01:01:53.095 Like, I'm a very impatient therapist, and I don't have an hour to wait for a guy to come up with three emotion words. 01:01:53.315 --> 01:01:55.655 I'm going to show him a list and he's going to pick. 01:01:55.715 --> 01:02:05.690 And I remember finding that with high school kids like, Oh my gosh, these kids that would not talk could easily sit there circling a page, and I would get incredible amounts of information. 01:02:08.470 --> 01:02:10.870 So AI might come up with ways to mimic that. 01:02:10.870 --> 01:02:17.825 But, again, I think one of the barriers is gonna be who who wants to talk to that thing and how much of your stuff do you really wanna put on the Internet? 01:02:18.925 --> 01:02:31.930 I'm more concerned also with this talk with, like, where, you know, the big like, the Kaisers and the UnitedHealthcare, they're wanting all this stuff because they want to provide fewer in person hours. 01:02:32.710 --> 01:02:36.090 And that is a very sad and pathetic trend. 01:02:37.110 --> 01:02:40.730 And we're going to see the consequences in other numbers. 01:02:40.895 --> 01:02:42.495 Like, those numbers might improve. 01:02:42.495 --> 01:02:46.355 They might be able to say, oh, more people are being seen now by these bots. 01:02:47.215 --> 01:02:56.570 But I'm still gonna wanna see the number of suicides and other ways that we might see more and more people getting off the grid, becoming homeless. 01:02:56.570 --> 01:02:59.070 Like, there's so much going on right now. 01:03:01.290 --> 01:03:02.490 You're gonna have to contact me. 01:03:02.490 --> 01:03:05.950 I encourage I don't care if I get, what is this, 67 emails. 01:03:06.970 --> 01:03:10.045 Contact me for some of these sheets. 01:03:10.045 --> 01:03:11.885 I try to put stuff on my website. 01:03:11.885 --> 01:03:14.385 One of them is called incapables.org. 01:03:15.005 --> 01:03:19.405 There's a idea that there's so many people dismissed as incapable, and they have so much. 01:03:19.405 --> 01:03:21.505 And I try to put stuff on there. 01:03:23.000 --> 01:03:24.760 I did wanna what other slides? 01:03:24.760 --> 01:03:25.000 Yeah. 01:03:25.000 --> 01:03:29.240 We're not gonna get into this other than Yeah. 01:03:29.240 --> 01:03:34.700 I mean, I kind of talked about it, but I see that we're real late. 01:03:35.775 --> 01:03:37.295 But, well no. 01:03:37.295 --> 01:03:37.695 Okay. 01:03:37.695 --> 01:03:39.455 Whoever's hanging on is hanging on. 01:03:39.455 --> 01:03:45.955 So in here, I tested the expressive writing where you write three essays, and there was no evidence. 01:03:46.255 --> 01:03:54.450 The the meta analysis showed that it didn't matter if these people were writing their essays a month apart, a week apart, or a day apart, or within the same day. 01:03:54.450 --> 01:04:02.870 So I was like, well, then why not create a two hour window where someone comes in and they give you three thirty minute essays and some breaks in between. 01:04:03.325 --> 01:04:11.885 And then we competed that against this brief trauma organizer, a series of worksheets with a therapist, and the green one did better. 01:04:11.885 --> 01:04:13.485 They both did well for people. 01:04:13.485 --> 01:04:14.605 It was great for people. 01:04:14.605 --> 01:04:16.205 So that I'm gonna call the AI. 01:04:16.205 --> 01:04:16.445 Okay. 01:04:16.445 --> 01:04:21.330 They sat there with just a few prompts, and they journaled about their most horrific experience. 01:04:22.990 --> 01:04:26.110 And, you know sorry. 01:04:26.110 --> 01:04:27.570 I did leave something out. 01:04:28.830 --> 01:04:32.735 If they found that if you change the topic, it's the green line. 01:04:32.735 --> 01:04:33.535 You don't improve. 01:04:33.535 --> 01:04:37.315 But three essays on the same topic, you keep getting better and better. 01:04:38.015 --> 01:04:39.135 So that was cool. 01:04:39.135 --> 01:04:44.115 So then I was like, okay, but what could a therapist accomplish in that same amount of time? 01:04:45.020 --> 01:04:53.040 And again, both were good I can't both were good for PTSD, but having a therapist there was a bit better. 01:04:54.140 --> 01:04:58.000 And, and this is only like one two hour session, ninety minutes really. 01:04:58.220 --> 01:05:01.875 And there's not much change immediately after the session. 01:05:01.875 --> 01:05:03.155 That's the immediate post. 01:05:03.155 --> 01:05:08.055 But fourteen days later, a lot had improved for both groups. 01:05:08.115 --> 01:05:12.535 And thirty days later, so the flat line means the improvement stuck. 01:05:13.010 --> 01:05:14.370 That's really awesome. 01:05:14.370 --> 01:05:18.070 From a brief intervention that could have been done at these inpatient facilities. 01:05:18.450 --> 01:05:20.230 I did it again later with veterans. 01:05:20.290 --> 01:05:21.270 I had good results. 01:05:22.290 --> 01:05:22.770 Okay. 01:05:22.770 --> 01:05:30.955 Depression, my thing, was better because sometimes just writing one of the problems with self help is rumination. 01:05:31.095 --> 01:05:34.635 Like, you just get lost in your own thoughts, and that's going to happen with AI. 01:05:35.975 --> 01:05:38.775 You need kind of another human to say, Wait, stop. 01:05:38.775 --> 01:05:39.755 Where are you going? 01:05:39.895 --> 01:05:40.395 Stop. 01:05:40.640 --> 01:05:42.900 And AI is probably not going to tell you that. 01:05:43.520 --> 01:05:45.540 So depression did better. 01:05:45.840 --> 01:05:46.720 Physical symptoms. 01:05:46.720 --> 01:05:49.200 I think I should have stretched this out so you can still see. 01:05:49.200 --> 01:05:49.520 Okay. 01:05:49.520 --> 01:05:52.900 They're still getting a 10 or 15 improvement. 01:05:54.765 --> 01:05:55.805 15. 01:05:55.805 --> 01:05:57.565 Anyway, those were the physical symptoms. 01:05:57.565 --> 01:05:59.585 The thought suppression got a little better. 01:06:00.765 --> 01:06:10.150 Acceptance got way better, having someone not only talk about the problems they're having now, but can you picture a time when you are healed, when this isn't your identity? 01:06:11.170 --> 01:06:11.910 That improved. 01:06:12.290 --> 01:06:15.990 And these are things, again, that can be delivered very quickly. 01:06:16.050 --> 01:06:17.350 Rumination improved. 01:06:20.745 --> 01:06:22.445 Again, I know. 01:06:22.905 --> 01:06:23.565 Oh, wait. 01:06:24.185 --> 01:06:24.585 Yeah. 01:06:24.585 --> 01:06:26.045 So people bring resources. 01:06:26.185 --> 01:06:28.345 They're not usually starting from scratch. 01:06:28.345 --> 01:06:28.825 I don't know. 01:06:28.825 --> 01:06:34.140 Did I show a guy in a I had a picture before of a guy in total, like, life support. 01:06:34.200 --> 01:06:36.040 That's usually not what we're dealing with. 01:06:36.040 --> 01:06:37.020 They bring resources. 01:06:37.160 --> 01:06:43.260 A human, I think, is gonna navigate that faster than AI will. 01:06:45.400 --> 01:06:45.900 Okay. 01:06:46.040 --> 01:06:47.420 This is just a pun. 01:06:48.315 --> 01:06:48.555 Okay. 01:06:48.555 --> 01:06:53.695 And this was just some of my website stuff. 01:06:56.075 --> 01:06:56.575 Okay. 01:06:59.515 --> 01:07:08.190 I am playing with having a a coaching practice separate from therapy because of, like, state lines and country lines. 01:07:09.130 --> 01:07:12.350 T shirts are just funny ideas I get. 01:07:14.250 --> 01:07:18.030 Incapables is where I'm putting resources for this kind of stuff. 01:07:18.585 --> 01:07:31.405 And then I did just write a book that imagines, like, James Bond when he's, like, 84 in a nursing home, and it's kind of a critical look at a lot of modern stuff. 01:07:31.785 --> 01:07:40.480 Not so much AI in that one, But let me see if I can add to this chat. 01:07:40.480 --> 01:07:43.220 I don't know if you guys are able to grab this stuff. 01:07:45.760 --> 01:07:47.620 Or as soon as it's over, it's over. 01:07:47.825 --> 01:07:53.265 But if you get the PDF or if you click on them now and but email. 01:07:53.265 --> 01:07:56.965 Just email me, and I'm happy to share as much as possible. 01:08:01.510 --> 01:08:05.450 So that has been, what, hour and forty. 01:08:05.670 --> 01:08:13.770 There's 62 people still here, so I kinda need a sense if people want me to show more stuff or that's good for today. 01:08:16.065 --> 01:08:19.045 There are some questions that came in, doctor Alessandri. 01:08:20.865 --> 01:08:28.085 Deborah wrote people are already seeking AI for real relationships and connection, like marrying an AI husband. 01:08:28.770 --> 01:08:32.470 This generation is comfortable with screen presence, not human connection. 01:08:34.370 --> 01:08:37.030 It's gonna be, I think, the way of addiction. 01:08:37.410 --> 01:08:39.170 Like, you do get a hit. 01:08:39.170 --> 01:08:41.010 You you get a dopamine rush. 01:08:41.010 --> 01:08:46.645 You get some satisfaction, but it's a pretty sad investment. 01:08:48.625 --> 01:08:51.125 So I think we need to encourage people. 01:08:55.345 --> 01:08:55.825 I don't know. 01:08:55.825 --> 01:09:01.030 There's a certain amount where, like, I don't know. 01:09:01.030 --> 01:09:15.935 It's it's gonna be gentle dialogue to hope that they want more and discovering the underlying anxiety that makes them think they can't handle real because that's an unfortunate thing. 01:09:15.935 --> 01:09:22.675 A lot of people are not very skillful, and they have contradictory desires. 01:09:23.695 --> 01:09:32.530 So in a sense, they're solving it because they want, you know, the emotional support machine, which is just weird. 01:09:32.530 --> 01:09:34.230 So it's not gonna pay off. 01:09:34.450 --> 01:09:35.810 They will in little bits. 01:09:35.810 --> 01:09:51.425 Just like washing your hands with OCD, it helps a little, but then it so the reason avoidance is a big problem with PTSD and anxiety, basically, every time you get a little fix for it, the lower brain thinks, oh, that was good. 01:09:51.885 --> 01:09:55.345 And so it thinks so it's called an escape mechanism. 01:09:56.270 --> 01:10:01.710 If I'm doing my PTSD homework here and I'm not breathing right, and I put it all away and run over there, guess what? 01:10:01.710 --> 01:10:02.830 I'm gonna take a deep breath over there. 01:10:02.830 --> 01:10:06.670 I'm gonna be like, oh, glad I got away from that stuff. 01:10:06.670 --> 01:10:08.910 And then this guy's gonna celebrate and be like, yay. 01:10:08.910 --> 01:10:09.710 I saved them again. 01:10:09.710 --> 01:10:13.375 He's like, no, you that's the ops the wrong thing to do. 01:10:13.375 --> 01:10:17.155 You should have stayed put and just dealt with it till you got to the other side. 01:10:19.695 --> 01:10:20.495 So I don't know. 01:10:20.495 --> 01:10:21.855 Part of me is a little cynical. 01:10:21.855 --> 01:10:29.040 Like, if they can't intuit that this is not a good way to go, like, we're not gonna be able to help people that don't wanna be helped. 01:10:32.300 --> 01:10:34.640 So some of them, we're gonna have to pick up on the rebound. 01:10:34.700 --> 01:10:46.885 Like, the prison population is people that are now at that ground level that are starting to wonder about that lower crack in the door and saying, oh, maybe I did miss something in life. 01:10:46.885 --> 01:10:48.185 Maybe there was more. 01:10:50.805 --> 01:11:01.060 And so I would just be encouraging people to, a, don't do it from a lack of confidence that they can't learn to have real relationships, and then hope they're gonna be more ambitious. 01:11:01.200 --> 01:11:05.220 Unfortunately, I'm discovering there's a lot of people with very small mindedness. 01:11:05.440 --> 01:11:12.355 Like, unfortunately, a lot of the staff at the prison, I kept thinking, man, these people are doing time as much as the inmates. 01:11:12.495 --> 01:11:18.330 Like, they're just trying to save for retirement, and they are not trying to make the world a better place. 01:11:18.330 --> 01:11:19.450 They're just doing time. 01:11:19.450 --> 01:11:20.570 It was just the saddest thing. 01:11:20.570 --> 01:11:22.990 It reminded me of waiting for jury duty. 01:11:23.290 --> 01:11:29.710 People just making endless chitchat about nonsense is very sad, but some people choose smallness. 01:11:31.690 --> 01:11:35.815 And I think we can try to encourage having purpose. 01:11:36.035 --> 01:11:38.035 Like, why are you really what are you here for? 01:11:38.035 --> 01:11:38.835 What can you give? 01:11:38.835 --> 01:11:40.695 What legacy do you wanna leave behind? 01:11:41.795 --> 01:11:45.735 Are you just trying to amuse yourself for the next thirty, forty, fifty years? 01:11:46.515 --> 01:11:48.695 What a strange ambition, but okay. 01:11:49.460 --> 01:11:51.460 On the other hand, you know, we have to respect it. 01:11:51.460 --> 01:11:53.480 Like, leave it if that's their choice. 01:11:58.980 --> 01:11:59.220 Yeah. 01:11:59.220 --> 01:12:02.580 I mean, that's never Richard, like, that is never gonna be a a real relate. 01:12:02.580 --> 01:12:09.125 Like, what a waste of time, to to spend, to invest a lot on that. 01:12:09.125 --> 01:12:10.485 You're better off playing video games. 01:12:10.485 --> 01:12:14.185 At least you're getting those skills, and now I hear you can be an air traffic controller. 01:12:15.605 --> 01:12:15.925 Alright. 01:12:15.925 --> 01:12:17.205 I hope this was useful. 01:12:17.205 --> 01:12:18.505 Again, I'm very approachable. 01:12:19.440 --> 01:12:21.300 I love to do this kind of stuff. 01:12:21.360 --> 01:12:28.900 I'm older than I look, so I see myself as like, man, I only got a few years left to share what I've learned, and so that tends to be my attitude. 01:12:29.040 --> 01:12:31.460 So please feel free to reach out. 01:12:32.275 --> 01:12:35.335 I guess I could There were additional questions, doctor Alessandri. 01:12:35.955 --> 01:12:36.435 Okay. 01:12:36.915 --> 01:12:41.395 From an anonymous attendee added, I relate to your life story so much. 01:12:41.395 --> 01:12:45.975 I am discerning to apply to a PsyD program at the age of 32. 01:12:46.700 --> 01:12:53.360 Transitioning from a career in teaching and marketing for the past eight years after hitting rock bottom in my life. 01:12:53.820 --> 01:12:57.840 Any advice on how to move forward with this career pivot? 01:12:58.385 --> 01:12:59.445 I think that's awesome. 01:12:59.825 --> 01:13:13.045 I mean, you're gonna have to apply to programs and take the loans or however you can fund it, but you're bringing a lot of real life experience that's gonna be very valuable to people. 01:13:16.010 --> 01:13:22.910 You know, when I was looking into it, I had to learn what's a social worker, what's a licensed clinical counselor, what's a psychologist. 01:13:23.850 --> 01:13:26.830 And even when I became a psych, I was like, I don't wanna do testing. 01:13:27.370 --> 01:13:31.655 Like, I probably would have been happy with a social work degree and been done in three years. 01:13:32.035 --> 01:13:36.695 I'm glad I did my path and the whole dissertation and learned more. 01:13:39.235 --> 01:13:41.715 But and the schooling part is just one piece. 01:13:41.715 --> 01:13:48.000 Like, later, it's more up to you and what you wanna learn and keep learning and go after. 01:13:48.300 --> 01:13:52.080 And populations, I've gotten a chance to work with different populations. 01:13:53.260 --> 01:13:55.280 Those are decisions you get to make. 01:13:56.395 --> 01:14:01.775 I mean, I don't know really what the question was in that other than I totally support what you're doing. 01:14:02.155 --> 01:14:07.695 If that's what you're feeling, you know, if you feel it, go for it. 01:14:07.915 --> 01:14:09.215 You're not making a mistake. 01:14:09.435 --> 01:14:11.615 Like, Oh my gosh, the amount of mental health. 01:14:11.910 --> 01:14:13.370 Like, there's gonna be jobs. 01:14:13.590 --> 01:14:14.310 Well, I don't know. 01:14:14.310 --> 01:14:14.550 Right? 01:14:14.550 --> 01:14:17.510 We're talking about they wanna replace us, but there's gonna be need. 01:14:17.510 --> 01:14:18.970 Let's phrase it that way. 01:14:19.510 --> 01:14:20.730 There's gonna be need. 01:14:23.590 --> 01:14:34.275 So the next question that came up was from another anonymous attendee that wrote, how will the profession of therapy change with the rise of AI? 01:14:35.455 --> 01:14:35.615 Yeah. 01:14:35.615 --> 01:14:37.475 I mean, I would just be speculating. 01:14:37.695 --> 01:14:51.510 I think maybe you should invite a lawyer or invite an insurance person to give these to give the really depressing news of, you know, I I can I can imagine Kaiser or whoever saying, like, okay? 01:14:51.510 --> 01:15:09.250 You get 10 sessions with a chatbot and two real sessions or some combo of that, and it's just gonna be stuff they can check off and say and they'll probably fund research so that they could say, oh, but we offered the gold standard. 01:15:10.670 --> 01:15:11.950 That's what they defend in court. 01:15:11.950 --> 01:15:14.850 All you have to defend is, is this what your peers would have done? 01:15:16.510 --> 01:15:17.570 It's just nonsense. 01:15:17.710 --> 01:15:19.650 Like, there's so little. 01:15:19.870 --> 01:15:29.305 And they come up with all this measurement and it always sounds good, but like, oh, okay, make the goals measurable. 01:15:29.445 --> 01:15:41.850 But it ends up now we have to work really hard to try to write some sentence in our documentation that looks like he will go from smoking 10 cigarettes to eight cigarettes in three day. 01:15:41.850 --> 01:15:43.230 Like, what is this nonsense? 01:15:44.970 --> 01:15:46.510 Like, navigate the nonsense. 01:15:46.570 --> 01:16:02.220 That's, it's gonna affect they're definitely the the bean counters that really want AI to take over and to meet this incredible need, but it's gonna I think it needs to be broken up. 01:16:02.220 --> 01:16:14.045 These monopolies on health care, I think I think something radical has to happen so that people can actually get services they need without I don't know. 01:16:14.045 --> 01:16:17.025 I don't know where the future I don't know how we're gonna pay for it all. 01:16:19.085 --> 01:16:21.505 I I again, there could I don't know. 01:16:21.565 --> 01:16:22.065 Yeah. 01:16:22.205 --> 01:16:22.685 I'm sorry. 01:16:22.685 --> 01:16:24.545 I don't have that as well thought out. 01:16:30.960 --> 01:16:37.380 So another question that came up, doctor Alessandri, is we were created for relationships. 01:16:38.400 --> 01:16:43.085 Young people only know AI relationships slash counseling, etcetera. 01:16:43.545 --> 01:16:45.565 Will they know what they are missing? 01:16:47.865 --> 01:16:49.565 I think deep down, I suspect. 01:16:50.505 --> 01:16:52.045 I think there's a lot of fear. 01:16:52.185 --> 01:16:57.410 I used to hang out on an app called Vent, and there was a lot of cries for help on there. 01:16:57.410 --> 01:16:58.610 And I didn't say I was a therapist. 01:16:58.610 --> 01:17:02.070 I just vented my own stuff, but I often gave advice. 01:17:02.530 --> 01:17:12.775 And there was just a lot of there are a lot of cries for help, but there's also, like, a lot of conditions. 01:17:13.635 --> 01:17:17.015 Like, basically, a lot of people saying, give me what I want. 01:17:17.555 --> 01:17:23.910 And so there's a lot of insistence that if I think my car is gonna run better on milk, I'm gonna put milk in the tank. 01:17:25.410 --> 01:17:26.470 And they're just wrong. 01:17:27.570 --> 01:17:29.170 But who am I? 01:17:29.170 --> 01:17:30.850 You know, like, it's their life. 01:17:30.850 --> 01:17:32.530 That's a choice they get to make. 01:17:32.530 --> 01:17:33.570 I think it's stupid. 01:17:33.570 --> 01:17:35.510 And hopefully I'll see you on the rebound. 01:17:37.545 --> 01:17:48.045 But on some level, we have to accept that not everybody wants like, if the planet's gonna blow up and there's some sort of Noah's Ark version of a spaceship, not everyone's gonna get on it. 01:17:50.370 --> 01:17:52.310 And that's the choice they get to make. 01:17:54.050 --> 01:17:58.130 But I think deep down they know and they want it and they crave it. 01:17:58.130 --> 01:17:59.330 They crave the real deal. 01:17:59.330 --> 01:18:01.570 But again, there's just a lot of trauma. 01:18:01.570 --> 01:18:06.785 There's often horrific stuff in their family of origin, a lot of despair. 01:18:08.605 --> 01:18:16.445 And so we do have to nudge people towards a new hope that you're at rock bottom. 01:18:16.445 --> 01:18:21.320 There's nowhere lower to go, so let's get moving in a positive direction. 01:18:23.140 --> 01:18:27.300 And I think I found that at the prison where people thought they were either hopeless. 01:18:27.300 --> 01:18:29.060 I mean, definitely with suicide watch. 01:18:29.060 --> 01:18:38.005 I mean, definitely there were some real ones, and you had to find reasons why the game is not over yet. 01:18:43.745 --> 01:18:47.845 So the next question is by Matt. 01:18:48.180 --> 01:18:55.720 Do you think there is a systematic motivation for perpetual therapy versus actual healing? 01:18:56.020 --> 01:18:56.260 Yeah. 01:18:56.260 --> 01:19:15.175 So there's a lot of people using a therapist to for friendship, And those therapists maybe don't always push back enough, you know, to get off the meter, get out of the cab, like stop paying for this, start joining some support groups, start joining some activities. 01:19:16.580 --> 01:19:27.160 But, yeah, I mean, there are there is abuse of therapy of people that just wanna have someone to talk to all the time who's not gonna judge and not gonna do what a real friend would do. 01:19:28.100 --> 01:19:32.325 So I think we should our goal should be to not be needed. 01:19:33.105 --> 01:19:39.445 Our goal should be to help that person achieve individuation, ability to be in relationships. 01:19:41.000 --> 01:19:55.020 Like, we should be pushing them away in a in a good sense, helping them think in terms of change and progress and getting back an hour of their week. 01:19:57.885 --> 01:20:03.245 When I was at one place, I remember they wanted us to keep it thirty minute sessions and 12 sessions. 01:20:03.245 --> 01:20:03.965 Like, okay. 01:20:03.965 --> 01:20:08.045 So by session four or five, start saying, you know, why don't we skip next week? 01:20:08.045 --> 01:20:09.425 Why don't we do two weeks? 01:20:10.070 --> 01:20:11.750 And then why don't we do four weeks? 01:20:11.750 --> 01:20:15.370 Like, some ways to start practicing what that's gonna feel like. 01:20:16.950 --> 01:20:27.095 And then and I don't know if my employer knew I was doing it, but so I got to stretch them out to eight months, but not a weekly session. 01:20:32.435 --> 01:20:35.715 I'm not sure if I missed, some questions. 01:20:35.715 --> 01:20:38.935 If I did, feel free to add them in the chat, everyone. 01:20:39.540 --> 01:20:42.260 I do believe I missed Patricia's question. 01:20:42.260 --> 01:20:45.880 How can AI be used therapeutically in positive ways? 01:20:46.980 --> 01:20:47.220 Yeah. 01:20:47.220 --> 01:20:51.320 That's one where I tried to answer before where it's like, I don't know yet. 01:20:51.705 --> 01:20:53.405 But that's like saying bibliotherapy. 01:20:53.945 --> 01:20:56.745 Like, how how can I use books in my therapy? 01:20:56.745 --> 01:20:57.385 Like, yeah. 01:20:57.385 --> 01:21:01.645 It's great to give people books to read or recommend books. 01:21:02.185 --> 01:21:07.850 But then the human cleverness is to say, I may not give them a book about anxiety. 01:21:07.910 --> 01:21:15.610 I might give them a book about I'm really into biographies right now, but I'm blanking. 01:21:15.830 --> 01:21:17.210 Like a really good biography. 01:21:17.990 --> 01:21:24.715 Because learning about someone that had setbacks and overcame them could be helpful. 01:21:25.655 --> 01:21:28.235 So I don't know how to use it yet. 01:21:29.175 --> 01:21:30.935 It's just a a a resource. 01:21:30.935 --> 01:21:31.655 It's a tool, though. 01:21:31.655 --> 01:21:42.100 It's not a replacement for what we should be doing as therapists or people in any kind of supporting role or teachers or so many other things. 01:21:42.100 --> 01:21:43.080 It's just a resource. 01:21:50.885 --> 01:21:53.625 I mean, that's a tricky question that's gonna need more thought. 01:21:54.165 --> 01:21:56.085 I'm not burning to use it, though. 01:21:56.085 --> 01:22:00.640 I'm not like, okay, because I'm coming up with my own structured stuff. 01:22:00.640 --> 01:22:01.780 I want some structure. 01:22:02.800 --> 01:22:08.000 There are times when I think therapists make a mistake or people make the mistake. 01:22:08.000 --> 01:22:12.160 There are some that just wanna tell their story over and over again for no therapeutic purpose. 01:22:12.160 --> 01:22:13.300 It's not for exposure. 01:22:13.745 --> 01:22:14.805 It's not to habituate. 01:22:15.425 --> 01:22:17.025 And so then you need to get at that. 01:22:17.025 --> 01:22:18.405 Like, why? 01:22:18.785 --> 01:22:20.485 What is really going on here? 01:22:25.425 --> 01:22:26.065 I don't know. 01:22:26.065 --> 01:22:27.620 For me, I'm an old guy. 01:22:27.620 --> 01:22:33.320 So for me, AI is just a way to summarize information that I don't have time to access. 01:22:34.820 --> 01:22:36.840 It's just a shortcut that way. 01:22:40.665 --> 01:22:40.905 Yeah. 01:22:40.905 --> 01:22:42.525 I don't have much more on that. 01:22:49.065 --> 01:22:51.645 Any other thoughts or questions? 01:22:53.570 --> 01:22:56.070 I appreciate the kind words people were sharing. 01:22:57.170 --> 01:23:00.710 Seemed like some people got something out of this. 01:23:01.730 --> 01:23:02.130 I'm happy. 01:23:02.130 --> 01:23:04.150 I hope people reach out, email me. 01:23:08.275 --> 01:23:09.235 But maybe yeah. 01:23:09.235 --> 01:23:10.275 I did yeah. 01:23:10.275 --> 01:23:11.255 It's two minutes. 01:23:11.315 --> 01:23:15.495 I wanted to end five my time, so maybe this is a good place to wrap up. 01:23:20.560 --> 01:23:24.340 Thank you for joining us, sister Catherine, Anna. 01:23:24.400 --> 01:23:27.380 Thank you, everyone still on the call. 01:23:27.680 --> 01:23:30.420 We really appreciate you joining us this evening. 01:23:31.760 --> 01:23:39.045 I did add the link to our next presentation, which will take place May 7 at 6PM eastern. 01:23:40.065 --> 01:23:42.565 I will add it again in the chat. 01:23:43.745 --> 01:23:50.085 I will also, share the presentation doctor Alessandri put together. 01:23:51.770 --> 01:23:59.390 As he mentioned in this webinar that I could go ahead and share it with everyone. 01:24:00.490 --> 01:24:05.230 He also shared his contact information in the chat box. 01:24:08.065 --> 01:24:13.285 We really appreciate your time, your questions, your interest on this topic. 01:24:17.025 --> 01:24:18.065 You're all so welcome. 01:24:18.065 --> 01:24:19.745 Like, you guys are being very positive. 01:24:19.745 --> 01:24:24.193 I really that because I sometimes I just think I'm babbling. 01:24:24.193 --> 01:24:26.960 I try to organize it, but it was it was tricky. 01:24:28.860 --> 01:24:32.780 But I hope I helped share concerns and resonate. 01:24:32.780 --> 01:24:34.080 It looks like it's resonating. 01:24:34.380 --> 01:24:36.000 I wish I could do a podcast. 01:24:36.185 --> 01:24:37.865 Again, it's an organization thing. 01:24:37.865 --> 01:24:46.445 I'm just like, I wanna do one called contemplating evil, or it would either be called contemplating evil or evil incorporated. 01:24:47.625 --> 01:24:55.520 Because in prison, I was like, okay, if someone doesn't believe there's a devil, you just spend a week here and you'll know there's a devil. 01:24:55.520 --> 01:25:00.580 Because in science, flipping a coin should be fiftyfifty. 01:25:01.175 --> 01:25:05.275 When 95% of things are going wrong, it's like somebody's doing something. 01:25:06.455 --> 01:25:07.595 It was just crazy. 01:25:10.215 --> 01:25:17.510 And I just find, like, oh, but what I laugh is that God incorporates evil in everything, and Lucifer just gets more and more pissed off. 01:25:17.890 --> 01:25:19.810 And God's not doing to piss her off. 01:25:19.810 --> 01:25:21.910 He's just like, oh, I could use that. 01:25:22.530 --> 01:25:23.730 And so he adds it. 01:25:23.730 --> 01:25:24.930 Like, oh, we could use oh, yeah. 01:25:24.930 --> 01:25:25.670 That fits. 01:25:25.730 --> 01:25:31.885 It's like a like Lucifer is just like this annoying child that thinks is very delusional. 01:25:32.585 --> 01:25:37.245 And the father actually is interested in the child and keeps using what she gives him. 01:25:37.625 --> 01:25:42.285 And she gets frustrated and thinks he's doing it to mock her, but it's like, oh, we could use that. 01:25:43.320 --> 01:25:44.940 Anyway, it's funny stuff. 01:25:46.280 --> 01:25:48.780 If you have idea if you wanna yeah. 01:25:49.160 --> 01:25:50.120 Oh, I don't no. 01:25:50.120 --> 01:25:51.500 I have not seen that show. 01:25:52.840 --> 01:25:54.300 I don't even know what it is. 01:25:56.985 --> 01:25:57.865 Other podcasts. 01:25:57.865 --> 01:26:04.525 I've actually started reaching out because I wanna promote my book, and I don't know how to get book reviews and all that. 01:26:06.345 --> 01:26:08.285 But I don't even know how to get on podcasts. 01:26:08.345 --> 01:26:10.900 I'm I'm I'm really bad at self promotion. 01:26:10.900 --> 01:26:12.980 I used to work in marketing, but it was copyright. 01:26:12.980 --> 01:26:13.780 I just like words. 01:26:13.780 --> 01:26:15.640 I love plays on words. 01:26:16.820 --> 01:26:21.480 And, if you know how to get on podcasts, send me some advice. 01:26:22.295 --> 01:26:25.275 I'll keep asking AI, but I don't think it's been that helpful. 01:26:28.935 --> 01:26:34.295 If you go to jamesprochester.com, that's it has all sorts of links. 01:26:34.295 --> 01:26:36.680 If you're okay with Amazon, it's got Amazon. 01:26:36.680 --> 01:26:39.260 If you hate Amazon, it's got something called Lulu. 01:26:40.360 --> 01:26:45.640 I used a, a pseudonym because the story on the book is it was originally written by a friend. 01:26:45.640 --> 01:26:47.720 It was a script a friend wrote twenty five years ago. 01:26:47.720 --> 01:26:49.340 We're both trying to make it in Hollywood. 01:26:49.535 --> 01:26:50.415 Never went anywhere. 01:26:50.415 --> 01:26:52.115 Either the concept was hilarious. 01:26:53.135 --> 01:26:54.655 I opened it again in '23. 01:26:54.655 --> 01:26:55.935 I said, can I rewrite this? 01:26:55.935 --> 01:26:57.715 Because it it was very thin. 01:26:57.855 --> 01:26:58.895 I said, can I rewrite this? 01:26:58.895 --> 01:27:02.915 And I started rewriting it, and then I realized Hollywood's not gonna make they're gonna change everything. 01:27:03.400 --> 01:27:05.580 So I was like, let me preserve it as a book. 01:27:05.800 --> 01:27:07.980 So it took two years to make the book. 01:27:08.200 --> 01:27:09.500 This is the other cover. 01:27:09.800 --> 01:27:14.620 There's a yellow large print and then a more Hollywood cover. 01:27:15.240 --> 01:27:16.440 And it's like James Bond. 01:27:16.440 --> 01:27:18.425 He's 84, but I can't say that. 01:27:18.425 --> 01:27:24.045 But, like, some comeuppances and the me too, you know, all that womanize. 01:27:24.185 --> 01:27:29.645 It's just I think it's a fun ride and a lot of commentary on modern craziness. 01:27:35.680 --> 01:27:38.660 Juanita, I don't know what the rest of the population is. 01:27:39.440 --> 01:27:47.680 I can, I can honor that and say a prayer at the end, or maybe you're already gone? 01:27:47.680 --> 01:27:51.325 But let's see. 01:27:51.625 --> 01:27:57.005 I guess if people are not interested in prayer, they can they can we can say goodbye now. 01:28:00.505 --> 01:28:00.985 Okay. 01:28:00.985 --> 01:28:08.480 So let's for Christians can bear with this, but for Catholics, in the name of the father, son, holy spirit, amen. 01:28:09.020 --> 01:28:10.060 Thank you, Lord. 01:28:10.060 --> 01:28:16.160 Thank you, Holy Spirit, for any way you might have touched people's minds and hearts with this presentation. 01:28:18.195 --> 01:28:24.835 Father, we ask you to help us follow your lead on where you're leading us in our lives. 01:28:24.835 --> 01:28:26.615 Help us to be quick learners. 01:28:26.675 --> 01:28:27.975 Help us not to resist. 01:28:29.395 --> 01:28:36.880 Help us to really trust and know that even when you lead us through pain, it's for a good purpose. 01:28:36.880 --> 01:28:38.100 We grow from it. 01:28:38.720 --> 01:28:56.085 Help us to have that confidence that if you do play a game, we play along and not get mad, that we really play along to your tune, which is always leading to a good place, but you don't you don't bombard us with evidence. 01:28:56.225 --> 01:29:02.100 You prefer that we trust, and then you like to show what you've been hiding and waiting for us with. 01:29:02.720 --> 01:29:37.740 And we ask our lady to intercede for us, to help us when we might be having a hard time going to God directly or just other ways to support us in our journey towards our ultimate end, and to be in that relationship, to take it seriously, but to also know what we need to improve in to serve our fellow people so that things are in the right sphere when I need more knowledge to seek more knowledge, when I need more prayer to seek more prayer. 01:29:39.365 --> 01:29:43.125 And, again, I think the simplest prayer is the one we were given, so I'll end with that. 01:29:43.125 --> 01:29:46.185 Our father, who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name. 01:29:46.885 --> 01:29:51.705 Thy name, thy kingdom come, thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven. 01:29:52.190 --> 01:29:58.610 Give us this day our daily bread, and forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us. 01:29:58.910 --> 01:30:02.430 And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. 01:30:02.430 --> 01:30:02.930 Amen. 01:30:03.470 --> 01:30:04.875 In the name of the father and holy spirit. 01:30:05.115 --> 01:30:05.355 Amen. 01:30:05.355 --> 01:30:08.975 Thank you all for joining, and I hope to hear from some of you on email. 01:30:09.515 --> 01:30:11.775 I am gonna bounce out now. 01:30:19.050 --> 01:30:20.110 Thank you, everyone. 01:30:20.330 --> 01:30:22.750 That concludes our presentation. 01:30:24.490 --> 01:30:44.665 We really appreciate you joining us this evening, and we hope that you enjoyed the talk, the conversation, the presentation, and look out for upcoming four presentations left to bring awareness, humans over algorithms. 01:30:45.365 --> 01:30:46.345 Thank you again. 01:30:47.480 --> 01:30:48.620 Have a lovely evening. 01:30:52.200 --> 01:30:53.260 Thank you, Natalia. 01:30:55.080 --> 01:30:56.540 Thank you, doctor Alessandri. 01:30:57.160 --> 01:30:57.660 Alrighty. 01:30:57.880 --> 01:30:58.380 Bye.